ZippyBippy
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Who's that ugly chick hosting the MTV Movie Awards?
about 23 hours ago
via TweetDeck
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You know what happens when you combine an energy drink with a sleeping pill? Not a damn thing. Dammit.
12:44 PM May 31st
via web
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Really getting nervous about the "never two without three" curse. Donna Summer, then Robin Gibb. Anybody know how France Joli is doing?
12:47 AM May 22nd
via Twitter for iPhone
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You think with all that extra money that Zuckerberg would be able to buy some new mom jeans. by now, no?
2:30 PM May 19th
via TweetDeck
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Lost my virginity on a darkened dancefloor of a dank Montreal club at 2a.m. to a 14min. remix of "Sunset People" R.I.P. Summer.Love!
11:18 AM May 17th
via web
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Me? Oh nothing. Just wrapping this huge bottle of massage oil for my good friend, John Travolta. Why?
7:47 PM May 8th
via TweetDeck
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when life hands me lemons, I...make a long island iced tea & then I wake up by the river w/ a sock in my mouth & covered in Polish tattoos.
1:42 PM May 8th
via TweetDeck
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Great. As if I need more distraction from getting a life aka F/T job, now I'm following @ (lightbulb) Maybe THIS can be my job:()?
8:36 AM May 8th
via TweetCaster for Android
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@ I am an excellent employer. No unwanted sexual or physical harassment.
10:01 AM May 8th
via Twitter for iPhone
in reply to TheReelMJE
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I don't believe in recreational drugs. I think they should be taken at work where they can do the most good.
6:11 AM May 7th
via TweetDeck
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You may not know this about me, but on American Samoa, I am considered one of the world's best interpretive dancers.
2:50 AM Apr 12th
via TweetDeck
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Looking 4 some1 just like me,only much much better.So, is any1 out there looking 4 someone just like them, only much, much worse?
9:09 AM Apr 10th
via web
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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, so you can one day go back & get even with those Asshats who tried to kill you in the first place
4:52 PM Apr 4th
via web
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I don't know about you, but I'm waiting until Twitter comes out with a douche before sinking any of my money into it:
10:50 AM Mar 30th
via TweetDeck
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Does anyone know how to stop these constant and annoying Ryan Gosling phone calls?
5:05 AM Mar 26th
via TweetDeck
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"Well, this is something new": Dick Cheney's new heart
5:51 PM Mar 24th
via TweetDeck
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When my Dominatrix says to me "this is going to hurt me more than it's going to hurt you", she sooooooo reminds me of my mom
11:55 AM Mar 22nd
via TweetDeck
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Quietly celebrating the steely courage & determination of the LA Marathoners by eating several boxes of mallomars & ring dings at my desk.
11:05 AM Mar 18th
via TweetDeck
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@ Thanks 4 the shoutout, John. You're a class act! . Come try our smoothies,raw juice cleanses & delish menu!
3:30 PM Mar 8th
via web
in reply to JohnBasedow
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If u guys r in LA area+looking for healthy place to eat, ck out @ - organic smoothies,salads+all around great raw food restaurant.
12:42 PM Mar 8th
via web
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- Name Zino Macaluso
- Location Los Angeles, CA
- Web http://www.twitte...
- Bio Wow. Your baby is really ugly.
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