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WWGT

  1. @ShawnRyanTV: "Chicago Code" canceled? Which Fox execs should I smote?
  2. In case you're wondering what happened to the Rapture on May 21: "Preacher Claims Rapture Aborted by NORAD Missile" http://bit.ly/iyR7mF
  3. The kingdom of heaven is like a cosmic Motel 6: We'll leave the light at the end of the tunnel on for you.
  4. Ascension Sunday: Jesus has left the building. (Luke 24:46-53)
  5. RT @Jesus: Bingo!
  6. Undercover Jesus reveals ID at Emmaus Cafe. RT @Disciples: OMG!
  7. 1st-century episode of "Undercover Boss." Jesus goes incognito with two employees on Road to Emmaus. (Luke 24: 13-31)
  8. RT @Peter: I went to the Empty Tomb and all I got was this lousy shroud.
  9. RT @Angel: Rejoice, MaryMag. Jesus has risen from the dead, creating a vast new market for chocolate bunnies, plastic grass and Peeps.
  10. RT @MaryMag: I'm at the tomb. Jesus AWOL.
  11. RT @Jesus: I'm baaaaack. Top that, David Blaine.
  12. RT @Jesus: No, I am not standing in line for the new iPad.
  13. Holy Saturday: Conflicting reports on @Jesus' whereabouts (http://bit.ly/9OS2fD and http://bit.ly/cpja2i)
  14. @ArimatheaJoe and @NickyD wrap Jesus like a mummy, place him in rock tomb. Pilate posts guards.
  15. CSI Jerusalem: Evidence indicates death by blunt trauma, loss of blood, suffocation.
  16. RT @Centurion: Oops! (Matt. 27:54)
  17. Earthquake, solar eclipse and world's first zombie invasion. Tombs open and dead people wander Jerusalem. (Matthew 27.52-53)
  18. RT @Jesus: Game over. (John 19:30)
  19. RT @Jesus: OMG! OMG! Why have you unfriended me?
  20. Las Vegas not invented yet, so soldiers gamble for Jesus' clothes. (John 19:24)