Tony_D
- "This is my rifle, this is my gun. I know I'm fat and stupid, but I don't know why I was issued two weapons."
#1stdraftsilentmovielinesabout 2 hours ago from web
- You take the blue pill, the story ends, you wake up in your bed, and that hangover is GONE.
#1stdraftmovielinesabout 3 hours ago from web
- Turns out the coffee I've been drinking all day was not "French roast" as I'd thought, but was in fact "hazelnut and sarcasm".about 5 hours ago from Twitterrific
- I know it's technically impossible for me to have "bed head", and yet...about 13 hours ago from web
- RIP Dick Sargent1:10 PM Jul 8th from Twitterrific
- @tweeteorites - please enable timelines for me.
( OH GOD I FEEL SO DIRTY )6:39 AM Jul 8th from web
- I have a $30 Best Buy giftcard.
Awesome. Now I can get myself something for $30 that would cost only $20 at any other retailer on Earth.1:24 PM Jul 7th from Twitterrific
- "Written, produced, directed, and bled entirely dry of any narrative logic, humility, or creative mojo by M. Night Shyamalan"4:47 AM Jul 7th from web
- No one has been able to satisfactorily explain to me why everyone actually loved Raymond.4:27 PM Jul 6th from Twitterrific
- My favorite new game for the iPhone is "Which Song Will Voice Control Decide To Play For Me Even Though I Asked For Something Different?".4:17 PM Jul 6th from web
- "More chowder!" I clamored.3:27 PM Jul 6th from Twitterrific
- Harry Potter and the Unfortunately Low Graduation Rate of Hogwarts11:57 AM Jul 6th from Twitterrific
- For the record, I hate hate *hate* talking on the phone. Period.7:28 AM Jul 6th from web
- @AmyJane "LOOK AT THE SIZE OF HIS.. oh.. wait.. umbilical cord."7:27 AM Jul 6th from Twitterrific in reply to AmyJane
- My friend D, in response to my asking 'How Was Your Weekend?':
"I had a psychic tell me I need counseling, so… that happened."6:45 AM Jul 6th from web
- I think I could use another 12oz of liquid patriotism.12:19 PM Jul 4th from Twitterrific
- Dear October,
I'm trying to enjoy 4th of July here. Could you kindly fuck off?
Love, Tony10:56 AM Jul 4th from Twitterrific
- @ange_black Send booze.10:55 AM Jul 4th from web in reply to ange_black
- ATTENTION HUMANS: THE DINOBRAIN PODCAST IS MY NEW FAVORITE THING.
THAT IS ALL.
http://dinobrain.com10:04 AM Jul 4th from web
- I'm spending the 4th of July eating Hebrew National hotdogs and drinking Belgian beer.
It's what the Founding Fathers would have wanted.5:03 AM Jul 4th from web
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