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Texxie

  1. Ava bolted an entire hard-boiled egg in three bites on the way to school, then reported her "tummy hurt". Yeah, NO SHIT Cool Hand Luke!8:12 AM Jun 12th from web
  2. Observed 79-yr-old Jewish man getting a manicure at the nail salon. Oh Preston Hollow. What an eclectic mix of rich white people you are.12:44 PM Jun 5th from web
  3. Am developing a fucking EYELID TWITCH. Always the bearer of good tidings.8:05 AM Jun 5th from web
  4. Well, it appears I am back on the Twitter Wagon. Clearly we have reached Work Avoidance Level: RED7:27 AM Jun 3rd from web
  5. So, I finally saw Twilight and I have to say that I found Emmett about 17836 times more yummy than Edward. Srsly.6:05 AM Dec 10th, 2008 from web
  6. G-D DAMN IT, how is it that I have 115 Twitter followers and only 101 Facebook friends? This is the New Math. DOES NOT COMPUTE.9:29 AM Nov 3rd, 2008 from web
  7. Today's work goal: acquire more Facebook friends than ex-boyfriend's new wife. DAMN YOU small town high school!4:58 AM Oct 29th, 2008 from web
  8. Okay, someone who has tried the "apple fries" from Burger King needs to fess up. How does...that work? What of the...oxidation issue?3:19 PM Oct 1st, 2008 from web
  9. On the topic of Food Diaries, I beg you to read this post: http://tinyurl.com/55g938 Hee! HA! Oh boy. So funny.12:43 PM Aug 28th, 2008 from web
  10. You know you're a low-maintenance ragamuffin when you dismiss everything on Banana Republic's website as "too dressy".7:21 AM Aug 27th, 2008 from web
  11. Just realized I have no Labor Day plans WHATSO. I hate when my Lameness creeps up on me like that.7:19 AM Aug 25th, 2008 from web
  12. If they can make bday cake flavored ICE CREAM, why can't they make bday cake flavored COFFEE CREAMER?7:47 AM Aug 22nd, 2008 from web
  13. 24 hours later, and still obsessing over the antipasto I bought at Market Street last night. GOD I LOVE SATURATED FAT.1:47 PM Aug 21st, 2008 from web
  14. Am the last person on earth to start reading The Kite Runner.7:03 AM Aug 20th, 2008 from web
  15. @Swistle_Thistle Clearly I have not yet mastered the art of the cell phone self-portrait. Plus, my good side is "aerial view".12:11 PM Aug 14th, 2008 from web in reply to Swistle_Thistle
  16. Trying to score tickets for the So You Think You Can Dance tour. LIKE YOU AREN'T.8:07 AM Aug 14th, 2008 from web
  17. MOVING TO LONDON. Also, new blog title: Ways I am an Asshole American3:55 AM Aug 5th, 2008 from web
  18. What are the chances I'll remember to change my voicemail greeting to reflect week of vaca? 40%? 50%, IF I affix a sticky note to phone?1:10 PM Jul 30th, 2008 from web
  19. Reports of my death, etc. etc.9:23 AM Jul 29th, 2008 from web
  20. Considering grocery run to obtain ice cream sundae fixins for entire dept. Where is Michael's "WORLDS BEST BOSS" mug when you need it?12:59 PM Jul 28th, 2008 from web