SleepTalkinMan
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"I'm in the mood for kicking faces and punching crotches. Woo hoo!"
about 10 hours ago
via web
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"Mother's Day. Father's Day. Disgruntled-I-Don't-Give-A-Fuck-Just-Give-Me-A-Day-Off-Work-for-FUCK'S-SAKE Day! Breakfast in bed, please."
6:08 AM May 28th
via web
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"Hey! Eat my organic fist, you fucking hippie."
6:08 AM May 25th
via web
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"Shhhhh! Why can't you midgets talk more fucking quietly?! I hate small talk."
5:57 AM May 23rd
via web
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"Look at your boyfriend. Now look at the potato. Now look back at your boyfriend. Who's sad now, bitch!"
5:59 AM May 21st
via web
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"I'm a big dose of lovin'. Take twice daily."
6:00 AM May 18th
via web
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"I'm not a god, I'm a king! No one knows who God is, but a king gets to wear a mother-fucking crown! And a big-ass cape. Yeahhhh."
6:10 AM May 16th
via web
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"I swear, if I ever have to listen to you, I'll claw my ears off, and fill the bloody gaping holes with decaying afterbirth."
6:07 AM May 14th
via web
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"Do they know it's Friday in space? Do aliens look forward to the weekend? Hmm, things to think about."
6:19 AM May 11th
via web
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"God judges you. Well, I judge God. This week: not bad! Still messing up in the Middle East, though. Sort it out."
5:58 AM May 9th
via web
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"Fucking unicorns. 'Oh, I've got a horn!' So fucking obnoxious. You're just a horse with a party hat, dickhead."
6:00 AM May 7th
via HootSuite
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"I'm not smiling at you. No, this is my I'm-taking-a-satisfying-shit smile."
8:26 AM May 2nd
via web
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"If you're looking sympathy… go get a fucking dictionary, you'll find it between 'shithead' and 'syphilis'. Now fuck off."
6:12 AM Apr 30th
via web
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[pt 1] "Oh, baby, the only time I'm ever gonna love you for your brains…”
6:01 AM Apr 27th
via HootSuite
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[pt 2] “…is if I was caught in some kind of apocalyptic nuclear explosion and was turned into one of the FUCKING LIVING DEAD!"
6:01 AM Apr 27th
via HootSuite
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"Ohhhh! If only I had my triceratops, I wouldn't have any problem with the goose. Damn you, goose!"
6:39 AM Apr 25th
via web
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"It's NOT a fat ass. I suffer from Hippo-bottom-mass. You should feel sorry for me."
ht
6:13 AM Apr 23rd
via web
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"It's science. It's meant to confuse stupid people."
6:05 AM Apr 20th
via web
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[pt 1] "They're nunchucks, Grandma. You know— Ooh! You're a natural! Like a wrinkly ninja...”
6:18 AM Apr 18th
via web
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[pt 2] “…Nunchuck skills... blatant racism skills... occasionally smelling of wee skills... can't forget the hairy fucking mole skill."
6:18 AM Apr 18th
via web
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- Name Sleep Talkin' Man
- Location London
- Web http://sleeptalki...
- Bio My mild-mannered husband lives quite a colorful existence in his dreams.
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