RyanStoutEnt
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Looking at old photos reminds me just how much I've changed since I was a kid:
about 14 hours ago
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This year for Christmas, I'm giving myself diabetes.
10:32 PM Dec 18th
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The opening scene in Jaws, where the girl's getting pushed around the water, shrieking and wailing-- How do I make her screams my ring tone?
2:58 PM Dec 18th
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Will be performing @ the Improv (8162 Melrose Ave, LA, CA) TONIGHT, 10PM! If you bring a friend, you pay double!
1:29 PM Dec 17th
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Looking for new car insurance; need a policy that covers this:
2:04 PM Dec 16th
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Mistook a shingles website for a singles website. Was wondering why that girl was talking so openly about her blistering skin rash...
5:12 PM Dec 15th
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Show me on the doll RT @ Mad props to @ for last nite's opening ... for @. He had me laughing in the good place
6:17 PM Dec 13th
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I prefer hilari-frickin-ous RT @ @ was hil-frickin-arious!
6:09 PM Dec 13th
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Great show w/ @ in Seattle. In appreciation of the crowd, I left a present hidden somewhere in the city. Lemme know if you find it.
6:04 PM Dec 13th
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Riding thru Seattle with @. 9PM show at The Moore Theatre. Free diarrhea (amounts vary) with purchase of a ticket.
7:57 PM Dec 12th
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Landed in Seattle with @. 9PM show at The Moore Theatre. Free tuberculosis with purchase of a ticket.
2:47 PM Dec 12th
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Headed to Seattle with @. 9PM show at The Moore Theatre. Free filth with purchase of a ticket.
12:20 PM Dec 12th
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Thanks, Portland. It was very nice to meet you. Please tell your mother that I'm sorry about the rug.
12:04 PM Dec 12th
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I lost a lamp in the first Gulf War.
1:11 AM Dec 12th
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Just found out that "COMEDY CENTRAL PRESENTS... RYAN STOUT" will premiere on April 30, 2010, at 11PM. Start the countdown.
3:05 PM Dec 10th
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Freezing. Somebody, turn up the sundial.
4:02 PM Dec 9th
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Read Mike Huckabee's "A Simple X-mas: 12 Stories That Celebrate the True Holiday Spirit and Make You Forget About Those 4 Cops Who Got Shot"
3:43 AM Dec 9th
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Why didn't this list ( of "5 Worst Co-workers of 2009" include Major Nidal Hasan (?!?
9:20 PM Dec 8th
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Will be appearing on @ tonight, 11PM EST. Tune-in to E! Entertainment Television to hear the audience moan at things I say.
5:18 PM Dec 8th
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If I thought I could study abroad, kill my roommate during violent sex-play, and get away with it, I would have-- That's why I stayed home!
4:15 PM Dec 4th
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- Name Ryan Stout
- Location Los Angeles, CA
- Web http://www.ryanst...
- Bio I travel around the country making people laugh.
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