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RexHuppke

  1. I've been trying for an hour to get my magic mouse to scroll my couch into the kitchen for a snack. This thing's worthless. about 8 hours ago from UberTwitter
  2. BREAKING NEWS: I think I have a chest cold. Phlegm at 11. 3:29 PM Nov 14th from web
  3. He whispered, "I have to work," even though it was Saturday. She didn't wake. His friends were right. Hamsters make terrible companions. 7:04 AM Nov 14th from TwitterBerry
  4. Remember kids, funny folk die without those yummy gold stars to the right of the tweet. Register at @favstar or @favrd. Click. Save a clown. 4:28 PM Nov 13th from web
  5. When I was a kid I used to go in the yard at night, hook up the hose and squirt water at the moon. Didn't realize I'd hit it. 2:52 PM Nov 13th from web
  6. I pretend people I hate have H1N1 then I squirt Purell at them. Fortunately, the law has yet to catch up to this pandemic. 1:47 PM Nov 13th from web
  7. @brianbolter Dude. You're a Tri-Leg-head, too? Sweet. Let's hook up for the 2011 TLF fest in Akron. I'll bring the book of canid jokes. 1:21 PM Nov 13th from web in reply to brianbolter
  8. @sucittaM Congratulations. It's a smurf. 12:13 PM Nov 13th from web in reply to sucittaM
  9. First I was afraid, I was petrified would be a pretty funny line to use if you were a tree. 11:59 AM Nov 13th from web
  10. All funnier than Palin's new book: @twistedpfister @Rationalists @crackbarbie @lafix @bonisteel @iamnotdiddy @jorshuwah #followfriday 11:52 AM Nov 13th from web
  11. Colorado is now known for both mountains and @beersuds. I prefer the latter, as it has fewer wild goats on it. #followfriday 11:48 AM Nov 13th from web
  12. Don't know where @sucittaM has been all my life, but dude makes good funny. And as everyone knows, good funny is good. #followfriday 11:44 AM Nov 13th from web
  13. All I know is @angryoldcoot is better at being angry, old and a coot than anyone else I know. #followfriday 11:42 AM Nov 13th from web
  14. I don't quite remember what life was like before I started following @aedison, but I'm pretty sure it was just awful. #followfriday 11:35 AM Nov 13th from web
  15. I keep throwing stars at @MrBigFists but he keeps swatting them away with his enormous hands. He's quite agile. #followfriday 11:33 AM Nov 13th from web
  16. This morning has had the comedic subtlety of a circa-1995 Adam Sandler movie. 8:59 AM Nov 13th from web
  17. "YOU can't believe it's not butter. But I CHOOSE to not believe it's not butter." Never grocery shop with a philosopher. 7:53 PM Nov 12th from TwitterBerry
  18. @bonisteel Hah! Sadly, no such phrase has ever been uttered in my direction. Hopefully not in Larry's either. 3:54 PM Nov 12th from TwitterBerry
  19. OK, that last tweet proves I'm a moron. It's just that any time I hear "King" I immediately think Larry. It's a burden. 3:29 PM Nov 12th from web
  20. I like your "Fresh Hot Coffee" sign cause the coffee's neither hot nor fresh, may not even be coffee, and I LOVE irony and punching people. 1:24 PM Nov 12th from web
  • Name Rex Huppke
  • Location Chicago
  • Bio A guy who writes stuff for money. Huge fan of hypocrisy. And shepherding. The kind with sheep, not the religious kind.
585 Following 1,859 Followers 208 Listed
John Rowan Pettett Aaron Durand Michael Sorce Miss Stacey Lynn Sofia R M Miss Chris pheend Twisted Pfister Justin Jewell Beersuds Doucet Anne Zacharias Bob Loblaw Jerilyn Pool Jabee D. iain Rachel B. Josh S Joe Schmidt dave holmes reverendross CJ Werleman Duffy David Singyke iamnotdiddy Rob in Oklahoma Paul Solomon Lauren Monitz Megan Severs Wanda Ann Ted Roden Joseph Wallace Jason Ryan Anderson