PFCain
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$1.26 billion worth of pot seized in California. Hopefully they'll sell it to help pay for such a useless operation.
9:38 PM Jul 23rd
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I don't hate all politicians. I only hate those I see on TV, hear on the radio, and read about in the paper.
9:33 PM Jul 23rd
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Diarrhea. The bad kind. It's what I've got right now. Like somebody turning on a dirty faucet every time I squat.
2:09 PM Jul 23rd
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Brock Lesnar is what Hitler had in mind.
9:08 PM Jul 11th
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Finally, a sequel is in the works for the Sega Genesis classic Michael Jackson's Moonwalker... Michael Jackson's Heartstopper.
7:36 PM Jun 28th
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I would like to start the bidding on Michael Jackson's half of the publishing rights for the Beatles song catalog at $10.
7:26 PM Jun 28th
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The cover of this month's Backpacker has "Your Lightest Load Ever" in big, bold print. Good thing it's not Men's Health.
7:19 PM Jun 28th
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Joe Jackson looks like the bad guy in Jim Carrey's The Mask when he's got the mask on.
7:18 PM Jun 28th
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The King of Sidekicks, the King of Pop and now the King of Infomercials. Which king will be next? Jimmy Dean, King of Sausage?
10:20 AM Jun 28th
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Tweets about Iran < tweets about MJ. This can only mean one thing: Michael Jackson's death is the result of a fixed election.
6:43 PM Jun 25th
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How long until people start seeing Michael Jackson in places like a Denny's off of I-45 in Texas?
5:32 PM Jun 25th
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Daryl Hannah was arrested for protesting a mountaintop removal in West Viriginia. Doesn't that sentence look like Mad Libs?
8:37 PM Jun 23rd
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Oh, and Jon & Kate are killed during the kidnapping. That way I won't have to see them on TV anymore, either.
8:19 PM Jun 23rd
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I hope some rich Saudi prince kidnaps Jon & Kate's "Plus 8" so I'll never have to hear about those damn kids in the future.
8:18 PM Jun 23rd
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Perez Hilton is bitching more about getting punched. I'm just pissed Will.i.am didn't have the balls to do it himself. Grow a pair, faggot!
6:42 PM Jun 23rd
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I hope some of the more level-headed members of PETA are discovering how fucking stupid their organization is.
9:00 PM Jun 18th
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doesn't look like a sandwich at Arby's.
8:59 PM Jun 18th
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I wouldn't get the shit kicked out of me by a guy in a bar after calling his girlfriend a dumb cunt.
8:58 PM Jun 18th
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@ FYI: Trying to register for your message board and it keeps giving a database error. Tried in Firefox, IE and Chrome.
11:53 AM Jun 18th
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Sent a drunken e-mail to a friend the other day. I misspelled more words than an Iranian tweeting under gunfire.
1:13 AM Jun 18th
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- Name Paul Cain
- Location United States
- Web http://paulcain.w...
- Bio The official Twitter of somebody else you've never heard of before in your life..
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