OverlandParker
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Halloween is named after the Greek God Hallo, the God of weaning children off breast milk through the use of candy.
5:49 PM Oct 31st
from Echofon
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Just when I thought my 2 y/o couldn't get any cooler, he asks if we can play "Pun-kins" for his bedtime music, as in The Smashing Pumpkins.
5:34 PM Oct 30th
from Echofon
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Thanks to those expressing concern after my last tweet. While my son doesn't have H1N1, I do have money in Nigeria I need your help with.
4:28 PM Oct 30th
from Echofon
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I bet everyone at my office Halloween party is going to be really scared when they see my son dressed as a 2 y/o with the swine flu.
8:33 AM Oct 30th
from web
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A lot of people from the porn industry are starting to follow me on Twitter. I assume it's because they think my handle is OverlandPorkHer.
4:07 PM Oct 27th
from Echofon
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New financial disclosures revealed that Sarah Palin was paid $1.25M for her book that is being released Nov. 17th titled "Quilted Northern".
12:51 PM Oct 27th
from web
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Don't give me a Friendship token on Facebook unless you feel our friendship is strong enough to withstand me making fun of you.
9:55 AM Oct 27th
from web
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My thought of "AWESOME, Red Bull in the vending machine" quickly moved to "I'm going to break this vending machine" once I saw they were $3.
9:01 AM Oct 27th
from web
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I've been chanting OV-ER DOSE, OV-ER DOSE, ever since I read enlarged breasts was a side effect of my wife's new birth control pills.
4:48 PM Oct 26th
from Echofon
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Harry Reid announced plans for a health care bill with a public option. So if you're poor, you will now have the option to pee in public.
11:35 AM Oct 26th
from web
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You show me someone who believes capitalism will fail & I'll show you someone who has never seen a leopard print Snuggie commercial.
6:04 AM Oct 25th
from Echofon
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What exactly does the children's farmstead mean when it says you can play in their corn box?
6:49 AM Oct 24th
from Echofon
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Glad i ate'r
8:46 PM Oct 23rd
from Echofon
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I just got done shopping at the Dead Corporation Walking store, I mean Blockbuster.
5:12 PM Oct 23rd
from Echofon
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What do you mean I'm the only one who still eats Fruit Stripe gum wrappers?
8:40 AM Oct 23rd
from Echofon
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My plan to let TV raise my son fell apart faster then the kid running by with the football as my son stood there yelling SWIPER NO SWIPING.
5:59 PM Oct 22nd
from Echofon
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Nokia filed suit against Apple claiming the iPhone violates 10 patents that Nokia planned on using in their phones 10 years from now.
1:13 PM Oct 22nd
from Echofon
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The gym is a lot less crowded before five but it's still pretty noisy when you factor in the sound of non muffled old people farts.
1:38 PM Oct 20th
from web
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Apple announced today that their new iMac now comes standard with a wireless keyboard, mouse, and happy sock.
12:35 PM Oct 20th
from web
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Why are the Heenes in trouble? I never got arrested when I told the police I saw my son floating away on a unicorn I made while huffing gas.
8:31 AM Oct 19th
from web
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- Name Michael Pierce
- Location Overland Park, KS
- Web http://www.michae...
- Bio I own a Professional Sports Franchise. Don't feel intimidated though, I never think of myself as better then you just because of my Fantasy Football Team.
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