Profile_bird

Hey there! OverlandParker is using Twitter.

Twitter is a free service that lets you keep in touch with people through the exchange of quick, frequent answers to one simple question: What's happening? Join today to start receiving OverlandParker's tweets.

Already using Twitter
from your phone? Click here.

OverlandParker

  1. Adam Lambert kissed another male performer at last night's American Music Awards, making it by far the most heterosexual part of the show.
  2. Facebook is a great place to reconnect with past acquaintances and lie to them about how cute you think their kids are.
  3. Social Media dies a little more every time a "Guru" is self-proclaimed.
  4. Oprah already has a new job lined up as a producer of her own network. Proving that the rest of America's unemployed workforce is just lazy.
  5. Oprah is announcing that after 25 seasons she's quitting her show to spend more time at home with her beautiful wife Portia de Rossi.
  6. Turns out that was just matted fur, my cat didn't turn into a transvestite after all.
  7. Many believe Kansas head football coach Mark Mangino will be fired once an internal investigation concludes that he tried to eat the team.
  8. In keeping with my goal of making my tweets equally offensive to both parties: I heard Barrack Obama has family ties to the Jonas Brothers.
  9. Sarah Palin told Fox News that she supported profiling but in all fairness she thought that meant racism.
  10. Johnny Depp now joins George Clooney, Brad Pitt, & Cher as the only people to win People Magazine's Sexiest Man Alive twice.
  11. Sarah Palin criticized Hillary Clinton's visit with Afghan President Karzai saying she didn't support big government controlling her quilts.
  12. I'm watching a news report about new government guidelines that suggest women don't need to start getting mammograms un...SIDE BOOB!
  13. I need to find the instructions for my Garmin GPS so I can change the accent of the lady's voice from British to Navaho.
  14. Zack Greinke of the Kansas City Royals has become the 1st player in history to win the Cy Young while playing on a little league team.
  15. Many buyers of Palin's book "Going Rogue" were disappointed once they realized it wasn't the Kama Sutra illustrated w/ Star Wars characters.
  16. Turns out "I have" is an inappropriate response when the cartoon my son is watching asks "Has anyone seen my Mom's special box".
  17. These toothbrush bristles are too stiff for my tender gum line, thankfully I'm at Target playing try it before I buy it.
  18. During a speech in Shanghai this morning, President Obama said he welcomed a strong China & that their lucky numbers were 3, 8, 15, & 49.
  19. You can lead a horse to a pitcher of water, but you can't make a pitcher of water bust through walls like the Kool-Aid Man.
  20. These cold & rainy fall days are really peaceful when my son is sleeping.