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NoHuddle

  1. @g7austin i told you to stop using Lexington Steele's
  2. The summertime in Phoenix is lousy if you don't know how to beat the heat like I do by cooking a frozen pizza in my car while I work.
  3. Ever since I've graduated I've devoted all of my time mastering Domino's Pizza Hero in order to get a job. What're you doing with your life?
  4. The best part about @robdelaney is the way he gives equal time to both @BarackObama and @MittRomney. He is so fair and balanced.
  5. I'm surprised I didn't break twitter with the greatness of that last tweet.
  6. The Dolphins first practice this training camp is actually band practice. #HardKnocks
  7. Can you believe a team with JLo Marc Anthony, Gloria Estefan, Fergie, Jimmy Buffett and the Williams sisters as owners are doing a tv show?
  8. Can't wait for the episode of Hard Knocks where J-Lo coaches the team for an afternoon.
  9. Goodell: "Fine. How about this Jaguars. You guys can have it when you move to L.A. or London in a couple years."
  10. Roger Goodell: 'No one wants to do Hard Knocks?" Jaguars: 'Ooh. OOH. ME ME ME! PICK MEEEEE!' Goodell: 'Seriously? Nobody?'
  11. Poor Jaguars, the NFL and HBO's Hard Knocks opted for one of the other terrible teams from Florida despite their pathetic hand raising.
  12. @spergers he already exists. his name is Drake. or as we call him, Wheelchair Jimmy.
  13. I almost took part in a trending topic right now, but remembered I'm too young to die, so suicide's sorta off the table.
  14. Saw a dog riding in a motorcycle sidecar with goggles on this morning so by all means top that interwebs.
  15. We fight hunger. We fight obesity. I say we start a program where the starved eat the obese. Problem solved.
  16. I sort of admire the old guy at work wearing socks and sandals.
  17. Dude wearing a Darwin shirt just asked me for change. I think the irony was lost on him though.
  18. Not a lot of better things in life than cutting off student drivers.
  19. @parker287 so sorry for your loss