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MyWifeIsMadAtMe

  1. We argued about the rules to Candyland as we played with our 3 year old.
  2. Hours on the phone with support, she says, They couldn't help me. I ask, What was her name?, She goes, Nancy. How'd you know it was a woman?
  3. The physical world has her stumped once again. I look her right in the eye and say, I'm going to write a book called "Physics for Women".
  4. Our shower vibrates loudly at a certain setting shaking the house. I awake with a start, she goes, What causes that?, I say, A crazy women!
  5. We're watching a movie, she and 3 year old get fighting & crying, I say, what happened, she goes YOU'RE NOT INVOLVED! (I wish! LOL)
  6. Me: When you call support, set up a random password, and then change it to our regular. She forgot: WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME EARILIER? (I did)
  7. She says, I wish I had the paper tax form instead of searching on line, I say want me to get one at the post? She says, I'M JUST VENTING!
  8. We all have the flu of doom. HACK!
  9. I think my wife stopped getting mad at me out of spite - (just so I won't have anything to twitter about)!
  10. Wife is outside my office door telling me something, but I'm not in there, I'm in the basement, I come up and say, Huh? She goes, Nevermind!
  11. Mom wanted the kid to eat a banana for breakfast, but the little one wanted an apple. I gave her an apple. I'm in trouble now!
  12. She gets madder if I mention that it might be PMS.
  13. She got mad when I left loose grapes under the fresh stems of some grapes. They go moldy that way. I am to eat the loose grapes first.
  14. My wife left the car door open all night, killed the battery, and got mad at me when I asked her, "How could you leave the car door open?"
  15. My wife got mad when I was trying to hear our 3 year old in the potty. I just shushed her when she interrupted us. Shhh-one voice at a time!
  16. She got mad when I told her the ice cream she was eating smelled "sour".