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MySyntheticSoul

Weather like this ensures no one's gonna show up to buy a thing, and also everyone working's tired as hell. I'm in for a long day.5:54 AM Jul 14th from mobile web
@happyfinesad Orientation? Oh, right. It's some pointless classroom shit.5:49 AM Jul 14th from mobile web
Just saw a Sprint commercial advertising ''Back-to-School'' cell phones. /facepalm.2:31 PM Jul 13th from mobile web
If only we knew how to establish a binary code in a biological entity...the power we'd wield...6:49 AM Jul 13th from mobile web
Compiling footage from my fourth to throw into one mighty montage. This is bound to be quite fantastic.12:40 AM Jul 12th from web
http://bit.ly/169iPx http://bit.ly/8zg0h http://bit.ly/fBavp Consider me amused.3:25 AM Jul 11th from web
1296 bottles of water. 24 to a case. 18 cases used. How many left? X=24x18. Y=1296-X. Wait...am I actually USING MATH? -gasp-3:59 PM Jul 10th from mobile web
I fully support bathroom wall graffiti. It gives us a unique glance at American culture and is fun to read when taking a massive crap.3:54 PM Jul 10th from mobile web
http://bit.ly/EEYpJ Now there's a thought...8:00 AM Jul 10th from web
http://bit.ly/177jU3 Looks like I won't make as much at MSP this winter. I was looking forward to a surge of nice cashy money.6:18 AM Jul 10th from web
It's gotten to the point where I can't sleep in past 8AM. If one knows anything about sleep, they know that's not sleeping in at all.6:05 AM Jul 10th from web
Bomb threats? You betcha! Makes my day seem about as exciting as an extended hospital stay.10:38 PM Jul 9th from web
Mountain Dew Throwback discontinued already? Lame. It was so much tastier than the regular shit.2:11 PM Jul 8th from mobile web
@happyfinesad I've got a bad case of killing Jews.9:40 AM Jul 8th from mobile web
http://bit.ly/f0dG3 Fun fact: I stumbled upon this article whilst reading a concise history of toilet paper. And people say I'm interesting.3:24 AM Jul 8th from web
Got that whole "eyes burningly tired" thing going on, but for some reason feel really out of place going to bed.8:38 PM Jul 7th from web
Brutally.10:47 AM Jul 7th from mobile web
Some days you just want to bludgeon a bitch or two with a rusty pipe wrench.10:44 AM Jul 7th from mobile web
All these months I thought I'd been cut off from health insurance only to find out that wasn't the case. But I will be next month. Great.9:19 PM Jul 6th from web
When a friend is indecisive on what he wants to get at a restaurant, only a true nerd would chide him for lagging the server.7:33 PM Jul 6th from web