Get short, timely messages from Johnny Ryan.

Twitter is a rich source of instantly updated information. It's easy to stay updated on an incredibly wide variety of topics. Join today and follow @MrJohnnyRyan.

Get updates via SMS by texting follow MrJohnnyRyan to 40404 in the United States
Codes for other countries

Two-way (sending and receiving) short codes:
Country Code For customers of
Australia
  • 0198089488 Telstra
Canada
  • 21212 (any)
United Kingdom
  • 86444 Vodafone, Orange, 3, O2
Indonesia
  • 89887 AXIS, 3, Telkomsel
Ireland
  • 51210 O2
India
  • 53000 Bharti Airtel, Videocon
Jordan
  • 90903 Zain
New Zealand
  • 8987 Vodafone, Telecom NZ
United States
  • 40404 (any)

MrJohnnyRyan

  1. How many times have we all said, "That homeless man is so cute I could just eat his face!"? 8:20 AM May 31st via Twitter for iPhone
  2. For dinner I had a Caesar salad, Mac & cheese and a homeless man's face. 10:14 PM May 30th via Twitter for iPhone
  3. Got my War+Penises in the mail. @yestimsmall @GrosNoir twitter.com/MrJohnnyRyan/s… 9:44 AM May 30th via Twitter for iPhone
  4. In Nicole Kidman's new movie she pisses on Zac Efron which is kind of a change of pace as she's usually shitting onto the audience's eyes. 7:43 AM May 30th via Twitter for iPhone
  5. Jerkaholics 2 Nite @ders808 @ADAMDEVINE @UncleBlazer @kylenewacheck @WorkaholicsCC 12:31 PM May 29th via Twitter for iPhone
  6. Anytime you bring up Weekend At Bernie's you have to put 25 cents in the Weekend At Bernie's jar. 10:36 PM May 28th via Twitter for iPhone
  7. Hanging by the pool today. And by pool I mean the big pool of feces & urine above the broken septic tank in my backyard. 12:09 PM May 28th via Twitter for iPhone
  8. WAR + PENIS is happening in SHITALY @yestimsmall @GrosNoir twitter.com/MrJohnnyRyan/s… 9:53 AM May 28th via web
  9. The cool thing about having a monobrow is they let you ride on the monorail at Disneyworld for free. 7:05 AM May 28th via Twitter for iPhone
  10. Watching the Happy Days episode when Fonzie plays Nazi Yahtzee with Potsie. 3:23 AM May 28th via web
  11. Just bought a $25 Mustache Ride giftcard at Wallmart. 9:01 AM May 27th via Twitter for iPhone
  12. Remember when mustache rides were only 5 cents? #nostalgia 8:58 AM May 27th via Twitter for iPhone
  13. "Prometheus? More like BLOWmetheus! Am I right, people?" - Comedy 6:05 AM May 27th via web
  14. @UncleBlazer #JizzardAttack 10:58 PM May 26th via web in reply to UncleBlazer
  15. Check out ESPN 4 at 8 PM tonight if you want to see the semi-finals of Smear The Queer. 7:29 PM May 26th via web
  16. I liked the part in The Avengers when the Hulk takes a big green shit and then Thor smashes it with his hammer like Gallagher. 4:52 AM May 25th via web
  17. I've found that the scale at the post office gives the most accurate weight of my penis. 7:35 AM May 23rd via web
  18. More Prison Tats twitter.com/MrJohnnyRyan/s… 6:58 PM May 21st via web