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Monimus

  1. Wrong Brittany, God, WRONG BRITTANY. about 7 hours ago from UberTwitter
  2. @sandramov They're called "trending topics", babe. Welcome to the new millennium. Don't be afraid. The internet is your friend. about 16 hours ago from UberTwitter in reply to sandramov
  3. It's not rape if it's online. about 19 hours ago from web
  4. Well there goes my chance at banging that chick from Just Married. about 19 hours ago from web
  5. Oh yeah? Well maybe I'm wearing all this cologne because I haven't showered in a month! It's called being environmentally friendly, Hitler. 10:31 AM Dec 20th from UberTwitter
  6. This Santa guy sounds like quite the stalker. 9:13 AM Dec 20th from web
  7. 300 million people are obese. 200 million live in America. 8:43 PM Dec 19th from web
  8. @wood He has 30 followers. I wouldn't worry about it. Report and block. Also, $5 for a bumper sticker? If I had $5 I wouldn't be on twitter. 8:37 PM Dec 19th from web in reply to wood
  9. I wonder if God ever looks at the world and says "Oh, God." 11:22 AM Dec 19th from UberTwitter
  10. There are two types of people in this world: Those that think that the "there are two types of people" jokes are funny, and me. 6:10 PM Dec 18th from UberTwitter
  11. When you sign your posts, you undermine the ability of the reader to look two lines up and see who wrote the damn thing. Sincerely, Moe 12:26 PM Dec 18th from web
  12. My girlfriend hates it when I pick up the phone and yell "FIRST." Noob. 8:10 PM Dec 17th from web
  13. Having an STD is like cooking; If it doesn't burn, it's probably not so bad. 8:31 AM Dec 17th from UberTwitter
  14. I got 99 problems and drinking is one of them. 6:42 PM Dec 16th from UberTwitter
  15. In Zen Buddhism, rather than correcting someone's behavior, one should lead by example. Which is why I was naked, your Honor. 9:39 AM Dec 16th from web
  16. My stats book is giving me the finger. Subtle. http://tweetphoto.com/6534977 8:05 AM Dec 16th from UberTwitter
  17. The bus turns into a taxi when you're the only person on it. http://tweetphoto.com/6533958 7:42 AM Dec 16th from UberTwitter
  18. After watching a Lady GaGa video, I realized my argument was invalid. 2:21 PM Dec 15th from UberTwitter
  19. @Stugazi No. "References." 1:47 PM Dec 15th from UberTwitter in reply to Stugazi
  20. Everything I know about vaginas, I learned from @sarkastickunt. 1:44 PM Dec 15th from UberTwitter