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MikeyADHD
I HAD TO POOP ON A BASEBALL FIELD BECAUSE GRANDMA DROPPED ME OFF AT SCHOOL TODAY.about 19 hours agofrom web
I AM NEVER GOING TO BE THANKFUL AS LONG AS AUNT SHIRLEY COMES OVER AND BREATHS WITH HER MOUTH OPEN.1:19 PM Nov 26thfrom web
THANKSGIVING IS WHEN CHRISTIANS GIVE THANKS TO JESUS'S MOMMY THE VIRGIN MACY.9:19 AM Nov 26thfrom web
BEAVERS CHEW WOOD WITH THEIR TEETH AND BUILD DAMNS AND LIVE IN GIRL'S UNDERWEARS.6:00 PM Nov 25thfrom web
GRANDPA'S HANDS HURT CAUSE THE LAST TWO ARTHRITIS PILLS HE TOOK HAVE BEEN DRIED PLAY DOH.7:33 AM Nov 25thfrom web
IF YOU WANT A GIRL TO CALL YOUR HOUSE THEN YOU HAVE TO LIE AND TELL HER NEXT TIME SHE PLAYS COPS & ROBBERS YOU WON'T SHOOT HER IN THE FACE.4:09 PM Nov 24thfrom web
I WORE MY FOOTBALL HELMET IN SCHOOL ALL DAY TODAY AND NOT ONE TEACHER ASKED ME WHY.4:05 PM Nov 23rdfrom web
MOMMY SAID I SHOULDN'T SAY I WANT TO BE A JEHOVAH WITNESS EVEN IF WHEN I DIE I WANT TO LIVE AT JAY Z'S HOUSE.6:01 AM Nov 23rdfrom web
GRANDMA WANTS MOMMY TO CALL AN AMBULANCE CAUSE I PUT SWEET POTATOES IN THE LITTER BOX AND TOLD HER MY KITTEN CHEWED GRANDPA'S TOES OFF.6:49 PM Nov 21stfrom web
IF YOUR FRIEND SAMIR SAYS HE IS A INDIAN BUT HE DOESN'T HAVE A BOW AND ARROW THEN HE IS A LIAR.6:14 PM Nov 20thfrom web
WHEN I GET ENOUGH MONEY I AM GOING TO BUY GOLD BARS AND MELT THEM ON MY NIPPLES SO I CAN BREASTFEED BABY LEPRECHAUNS.6:11 AM Nov 20thfrom web
I WAS IN THE MALL FOR TWO HOURS BEFORE GRANDMA NOTICED I DIDN'T HAVE ANY PANTS ON.6:23 PM Nov 19thfrom web
MY TEACHER ASKED ME WHAT I WANT TO BE WHEN I GROW UP AND I TOLD HER A BLACK MIDGET.2:01 PM Nov 19thfrom web
I'M GOING TO BUILD A SPACESHIP MADE OUT OF MONKEY ARMS.6:12 AM Nov 19thfrom web
WHY DID PRESIDENT OBAMA HAVE TO GO TO ALL THOSE COUNTRIES IN ASIA IF AT EVERY COUNTRY HE JUST MET WITH THE SAME PERSON AGAIN?2:48 PM Nov 18thfrom web
MY BUS DRIVER DIDN'T PICK ME UP BECAUSE SHE IS A HAIRY ALCOHOLIC.7:37 AM Nov 18thfrom web
GLOBAL WARMING IS WHEN EVERYTHING GETS HOT & WE CAN'T BREATH CAUSE MOTHER NATURE HELD EARTH'S HEAD UNDER THE BLANKETS WHEN SHE FARTED.6:37 AM Nov 18thfrom web
YOU CAN'T CALL YOUR MOMMY A DOOKIE MOUTHED TURD TOOTH EVEN IF SHE SAYS YOUR LAST TWEET WAS NOT PROPER ENGLISH.6:27 AM Nov 17thfrom web
I'M NOT GOING TO CALL HER LUNCH LADY BECAUSE SHE IS A TATER-TOT TERRORIST.1:46 PM Nov 16thfrom web
MY KARATE UNIFORM IS CALLED A GI AND WHEN I WEAR IT I'M GONNA CHOP YOUR FACE OFF.5:23 AM Nov 16thfrom web
