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Lobed

  1. "feel free to come back for more pain med scripts. Seriously, whatever you want. I trust you." about 8 hours ago from UberTwitter
  2. I'm treating my back problems with muscle relaxers, bon iver, and blueberry/white chocolate pie. Not a bad thursday night. about 22 hours ago from UberTwitter
  3. Beach baby 6:47 PM Dec 9th from UberTwitter
  4. My roomate's niece made me a cotton ball Santa beard. Um, thank you. 1:23 PM Dec 7th from UberTwitter
  5. @dan_slowey I'm stuffing the leftovers in an envelope and mailing it to you. 7:47 PM Dec 6th from UberTwitter in reply to dan_slowey
  6. This is either going to be amazing or the biggest mistake of the day. http://tweetphoto.com/5971185 2:41 PM Dec 6th from UberTwitter
  7. Having an advance directive should probably be a requirement for playing in the NFL. 8:56 AM Dec 6th from UberTwitter
  8. My sister is unmatched in the art of sabotage. Fortunately, I am unmatched in the art of almost-mean practical jokes. 10:36 PM Dec 5th from UberTwitter
  9. @dan_slowey pick on somebody your own size 4:11 PM Dec 5th from UberTwitter in reply to dan_slowey
  10. Yaay christmas lights all over the house!! http://tweetphoto.com/5787589 7:13 PM Dec 3rd from UberTwitter
  11. I would be very impressed if someone were to make a house of cards in which the cards were made of gingerbread. 7:28 PM Dec 2nd from UberTwitter
  12. "I Go To The Barn Because I Like The" might be the most romantic song of all time. 1:42 PM Dec 2nd from UberTwitter
  13. @cockerham "this is definitely a level five hoarding situation." I'm already obsessed with this show. 7:18 PM Nov 30th from UberTwitter in reply to cockerham
  14. It's such a shame that men will never be able to experience the delight that is warm-coffee-nestled-in-crotch-while-driving. 11:09 AM Nov 30th from UberTwitter
  15. I cannot keep my hands off my new computer. I want to marinate it in honey and eat it. 2:48 PM Nov 29th from UberTwitter
  16. I got a wave invite!! From Google himself!! 6:23 AM Nov 29th from UberTwitter
  17. Whoever wrote the lines for the killer in the Scream movies should really get into telenovelas. 6:33 PM Nov 28th from UberTwitter
  18. I am almost positive there is coitus happening right now on the golf course behind my house. 9:00 PM Nov 26th from UberTwitter
  19. About to transform into Mollys Tasty Tofu Turkey Sticks http://pic.gd/136d4 8:38 AM Nov 26th from UberTwitter
  20. A gun on the mantle in the first act will always go off in the third. 8:10 PM Nov 24th from UberTwitter