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Ledgerized

  1. Police call apathetic neighbor “person of disinterest.” http://bit.ly/3grNNG
  2. Giant, feel-good mural does little to reduce crime. http://bit.ly/1uxiBS
  3. Crippled co-worker sipping and puffing around like he owns the place. http://bit.ly/46Fk6S
  4. Founders of The Heath Ledger awarded Nobel Prize for Literature http://bit.ly/2u4jmf
  5. Self-described ‘Philanderthropist’ donates sperm all over town. http://bit.ly/G4xwm
  6. Fake publication’s press schedule thrown off by real-life work schedule. http://bit.ly/1KFRGH
  7. Talk like a Pittsburgh Pirate Day 2009 http://bit.ly/16G7gN
  8. Local news source finally publishes kid-friendly 'story.' http://bit.ly/tN8mR
  9. Area entrepreneur’s dick-flavored chewing gum all the rage in some circle-jerks. http://bit.ly/17fMmv
  10. Just five days before home opener, Browns coach Eric Mangini releases himself. http://bit.ly/37bSX0
  11. Area homeless man laments cardboard’s inability to provide nourishment. http://bit.ly/pYisz
  12. Local man goes home sick after going what can only be described as #3. http://bit.ly/2e2jr
  13. Phenomenal success of Heath coffee house attributed to delicious, oh-so-satisfying mocha felatte. http://bit.ly/xiJPX
  14. Area business “going out of business.” Again. http://bit.ly/bTzoV
  15. Local charity encourages you to get a “Heart On” for kids. http://bit.ly/14vECw
  16. Area husband wants to know if wife also has a “mouth tract infection.” http://bit.ly/pbZSV
  17. Company meeting theme upsets area retards. http://bit.ly/Bo7TG
  18. Handicapped stall allows non-handicapped man 'room to bowel move.' http://bit.ly/wy4cN
  19. Kim Jong Il “ill” with pancreatic cancer. Hahahahahahahahahahaha! http://bit.ly/e1K30
  20. Area dog kind of an asshole. http://bit.ly/I7ECv