Jesus_M_Christ
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If Liam Neeson was one of my disciples I bet he wouldn't have let those fuckers crucify me.
about 4 hours ago
via web
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I bet gay dudes laugh it up when they order a Meat Lover's pizza.
about 5 hours ago
via web
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All you conservatives fucking with Obama in the trending topics. I know you're not in church.
about 15 hours ago
via web
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Soulja Boy should watch his back on Memorial Day. Just sayin'.
12:43 PM May 26th
via web
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While it's not true that all dogs go to Heaven, we have been seeing a lot more since they opened that Korean BBQ joint.
7:51 AM May 26th
via web
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People who microwave fish in a shared kitchen should be waterboarded in Rosie O'Donnell's bathwater.
7:34 AM May 26th
via web
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Anybody know how to tell a receding hairline to cut it the fuck out? I NEED this shit.
12:47 PM May 24th
via web
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That commandment about 'not coveting thy neighbor's ass" really sucks if you live next door to Shakira.
8:42 PM May 23rd
via web
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RIP Justin Bieber? Oh hell no. He's your problem, not ours.
8:02 PM May 23rd
via web
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"Siri, how do I find an easy joke format?"
9:05 AM May 17th
via web
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Mom gets so upset when people talk about their intimate relationship with God in public.
5:02 PM May 21st
via web
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"Omniscient" my ass, I'm high as shit and I can't find the remote.
7:58 PM May 20th
via web
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Just bought myself a "What Would Clint Eastwood Do?" bracelet.
8:35 PM May 19th
via web
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Dad's going to tweak the laws of physics next time around. Somehow things got fucked up.
8:11 PM May 17th
via Twitter for iPad
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Get out the disco ball. Tonight, we're gonna party!
5:34 PM May 17th
via web
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Yo someone tell my neighbor his router isn't working and now nobody has internet
10:37 AM May 17th
via Twitter for iPhone
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Mom's giving me hell for making the wrong wine for her Mother's Day lunch. BITCH, DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD I WORKED ON THIS BOX OF FRANZIA?!
3:38 PM May 13th
via web
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I love you, mom! Thanx for teaching me to lie about being a virgin! U r da best!
9:26 PM May 12th
via web
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Barack, now that's what Jesus would do.
9:03 PM May 9th
via Twitter for iPad
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It's pretty gay of North Carolina to deny gay marriage.
7:44 PM May 9th
via web
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- Name Jesus Christ
- Location Paradise
- Web http://www.facebo...
- Bio You know who I am. If not, google me bitches. jmchrist2012@yahoo.com (for the boobs)
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