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JerseyGirlinTX

  1. @dbizzle69 Thank you dear! 12:25 PM Jul 9th from web in reply to dbizzle69
  2. If you're a guy and you're wearing skinny jeans, at best, I might mistake you for an attractive woman. 12:23 PM Jul 9th from web
  3. Last night's party includedd the recreational use of a taser. Sometimes my friends worry me. 11:41 AM Jul 5th from web
  4. Oy. 2:05 PM Jul 3rd from web
  5. Nothing says happy like buzzed before 7 pm. 5:26 PM Jul 2nd from web
  6. Does "asshole" count as a nickname? 8:32 PM Jul 1st from web
  7. The most exciting past of my day so far was an egg mcmuffin. Actually it was pretty fucking awesome. 8:55 AM Jun 26th from web
  8. I don't really want to go to this bar, but I feel morally obligated. 9:04 PM Jun 21st from web
  9. Really hungry. Will have to venture outside the office. 11:40 AM Jun 20th from web
  10. @dbizzle69 @ovnio Poets tonight? 11:24 AM Jun 19th from web in reply to dbizzle69
  11. If you try to convince me that Britney Spears is a great musician, I'm not going to take anything you say seriously from now on. Ever. 11:14 AM Jun 19th from web
  12. The 99 cent store sells condoms! Fortunately they also sell home pregnancy tests and wire coat hangers. 3:44 PM Jun 15th from web
  13. ugh too early to be at work 5:25 AM Jun 15th from web
  14. It seems unfortunate that the hugely swollen boobs phase of my cycle coincides with the IF YOU TRY TO TOUCH MY BOOBS I WILL KILL YOU phase. 8:10 AM Jun 14th from web
  15. Nothing like showing up at work to find an email informing you that there are two cases of swine flu at your university. 8:20 AM Jun 12th from web
  16. Sometimes, all I need is the air that I breath and to love you... Those times are generally between meals. 5:23 PM Jun 11th from web
  17. Preferably an amber ale and a brunette with a nice ass. 5:16 PM Jun 4th from web
  18. Just finished another dissertation chapter. Need a beer and some oral stat. 5:15 PM Jun 4th from web
  19. @abigvictory From Dusk til Dawn 9:19 AM Jun 4th from web in reply to abigvictory
  20. Fuck t-shirts. I want my tweets printed on beer koozies. 8:32 PM Jun 3rd from web