Jasph
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Five minutes of pure 1973 joy. The vid's extraneous, my prose miscellaneous, but the song's extrazaneous.
about 13 hours ago
from web
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2 hrs in the hotel pool, "extreme vertical-launching" an 8yo into the air for subsequent "breakdance-submersion." I can barely lift my arms.
8:50 PM Nov 28th
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Casino hotel wake-up service, 3 a.m.: two fatties in a shouting/shoving match in the hall & one slams the other into your door.
7:52 AM Nov 28th
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The parade balloon of my wife's pumpkin ravioli got loose! Oh, the butter-sage chaos! Same as turning into a skid--run TOWARD the balloon!
7:52 AM Nov 26th
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Lo, I have exercised twice in 3 days. That's 2x more than in the previous 3 months, which is like ow hamstring sweatgasp shoulderthingy help
1:56 PM Nov 23rd
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Coffee. Sunday NY Times. *Köln Concert.* Daughter home for a week. 8yo laughing. Cat asleep on my wife's lap. Paradise. Fuck the hereafter.
7:48 AM Nov 22nd
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See "A Serious Man." Schrödinger's cat, stoners, Amy Landecker, a rabbi quoting Jefferson Airplane, possibly a dybbuk. What's not to like?
10:23 PM Nov 20th
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15 min. to download Esquire's augmented reality gizmo, but it says I don't have a webcam. Oh? Then what's this I'm mooning, motherfuckers?
11:53 AM Nov 20th
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Chefs, we asked you to do in a few hours what usually takes days to pull off. Please stab yourselves with forks as we deride your efforts.
9:01 PM Nov 18th
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Evidently, Harper's magazine never saw the Paris Hilton tape, or they'd know sex with robots is old news.
9:22 AM Nov 16th
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@ Happy bday. Sent a gift yesterday (via gmail, so I gotta ask: did you get it?). Requires assembly with parts neither of us has yet.
6:20 AM Nov 16th
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in reply to awryone
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This hifalutin' couchtard & his soliloquy on football aesthetics? I'd ice the guy, but the Lord hath fix'd His canon 'gainst self-slaughter.
3:18 PM Nov 15th
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You can lead a kid to the correct anatomical nomenclature, but you can't make him call his penis anything other than "The Special Visitor."
6:19 AM Nov 13th
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A goat plays the violin in the sky above our shtetl this morning. My asshole neighbor shakes his fist, yelling, "You got a lotta Chagall..."
5:54 AM Nov 12th
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"There's a Manga in my Moleskine,"
said the doe-eyed demi-tween.
"It monetized my narrative
and mesmerized my spleen."
1:10 PM Nov 11th
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@ I must decline your challenge. As everyone knows, I'm conflict-averse. What? You say they don't know? Um, let's not argue about it.
6:09 AM Nov 11th
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in reply to PlobRoz
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My kid's teacher is so great, I'd like to gay-marry him behind the school. Too bad neither of us is gay & behind the school is still Kansas.
1:11 PM Nov 10th
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Pimped out the 8yo on a busy corner, busking with his djembe. Made $12 in 1 hr, then said his hands hurt. So does Daddy's job security, son.
7:25 PM Nov 7th
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I'm on p. 21 of this script, p. 15 of this other one, and p. 8 of this other other one. Taken together, that's 44 pp. of secondactphobia.
7:52 PM Nov 5th
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O, if I were John Keats, I’d write a moody ode to the roar of my neighbor’s leafblower at 6:45 a.m., then cough consumptively and die young.
8:16 AM Nov 2nd
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- Name Jas P Howard
- Location The lesser Midwest
- Web http://spulgenine...
- Bio Prosodist, screenwriter, hired word-gun. Father of three; master of none.
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