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IndiscreetTweet

  1. Jay Leno is a cockroach in a nuclear winter, happily feasting on the debris and remains and... he... will... outlive... us... all. 32 minutes ago from Tweetie
  2. Jay Leno is capable of more than just sucking all the funny out of America. He has also sucked the careers out of once funny men. about 1 hour ago from web
  3. The TSA didn't let Joan Rivers on the plane because they had "reason to believe" the plastic in her face contained PETN. 7:35 AM Jan 6th from Tweetie
  4. I'm sorry but there are some things that should never be seen in 3-D. Like Nancy Grace's nose. 7:30 AM Jan 6th from Tweetie
  5. The Devil told Rush Limbaugh that every time he says "Democrat Party," he buys another hour on this mortal coil. 4:17 AM Jan 6th from Tweetie
  6. My followers are truly organic. Corn-fed and cage-free. 7:53 PM Jan 5th from web
  7. Al Gore would like to argue that these record sub-zero temperatures do not disprove global warming, but his jaw is frozen shut. 8:23 AM Jan 5th from web
  8. I can't wait to get my hands on these Apple Cold and Sinus tablets. 8:24 PM Jan 4th from Tweetie
  9. So Gatorade has dumped Tiger for Ali. Trading up. 8:07 PM Jan 4th from Tweetie
  10. Chad Ochocinco, who has injured his left knee, just announced he will change his last name to Ouchocinco. #NFL 7:29 PM Jan 3rd from Tweetie
  11. You can see real fear in the GEICO gekko's eyes now that the creepy old man has followed him into the can. 6:04 PM Jan 3rd from Tweetie
  12. Just what Fatso America needs-- Pepsi Throwback, MADE WITH REAL SUGAR AND PACKED WITH CARBS! 5:44 PM Jan 3rd from Tweetie
  13. Today is National Cream Puff Day. Give Urban Meyer and Brett Favre a hug. 6:16 AM Jan 2nd from Tweetie
  14. Happy New Year, Sweetcakes! Let's make 2010 productive! Truly special! Magical! Now go fetch me a beer. 6:09 AM Jan 1st from Tweetie
  15. Just stuck a shiv in the neck of 2009. 9:06 PM Dec 31st, 2009 from Tweetie
  16. The man on the moon has turned blue from holding his breath until this horrific decade ends. 12:58 PM Dec 31st, 2009 from Tweetie
  17. Why is everyone in a tizzy over a "terrorist" who used a firecracker to blow off his wee-wee? 12:09 PM Dec 31st, 2009 from Tweetie
  18. OK, my New Year's resolution is to stop swearing at you. Ya frucking happy now? Ya frucking crunt. 4:35 AM Dec 31st, 2009 from Tweetie
  19. Brett Favre wept magical tears in the locker room. The tears were collected in a jar and will be sent to ESPN HQ. Holy water. 9:38 PM Dec 28th, 2009 from Tweetie
  20. Al Qaeda proudly admits, "Yup, the nitwit who lit his crank on fire is one of us." 11:25 AM Dec 28th, 2009 from Tweetie