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GPappalardo

  1. So, Europe has their own virtual reality glasses now or something. I wonder if they're rosy.
  2. I totally forgot the Ping Pong 500 sponsored by Methamphetamines™ was going on next door this weekend.
  3. Tubular.
  4. I think women are plotting to take over the world with keychains, I just don't know how.
  5. I shouldn't be awake and that mess down there proves it.
  6. At the 'We Love Manatees Boutique' you can rest assured knowing all our products are made from 100% pure manatee.
  7. Fighters fuck up, and lovers fuck down.
  8. My least favorite words are "that's not almond rocha".
  9. I don't know, the gerbil just wouldn't crawl up there.
  10. I have protection now, my naked fingers will no longer touch your bare avatars.
  11. I usually have crackers when I rub myself down with Crisco.
  12. I didn't really follow that fake Tilda Swinton account because they were clearly making fun of her penis and that's just not cool.
  13. In my daughters world ketchup is a main course.
  14. I'm growing my back and shoulder hair out so if I go bald I have something to comb over.
  15. Ever since I got rid of my Rover for a family car I've been stricken with cylinder envy.
  16. If you ever want to know when it's going to rain in San Diego, just ask me when I'm going to wash my car next.
  17. The news just said bud is heading in our direction, like from the sky I think. Am I dead.
  18. Hi gh.
  19. Sometimes a penis is a helicopter that can't fly.
  20. I usually take off my shoes before I tell an inside joke.