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DustinAbel

  1. :D RT @emilyishere: "Well that ass smacking isn't loud.... #awkward" 5:37 AM May 23rd via Twitter for iPhone
  2. I'm in Germany trying to avoid driving into the assfarts. I mean, ausfahrts. twitter.com/DustinAbel/sta… 10:17 AM May 18th via web
  3. It's 2AM in Germany. Nothing but phone sex commercials with topless women. It sounds like the narrator is reading a list of auto parts. 4:55 PM May 17th via web
  4. Never realized how "I can't." translates into "I don't want to." until now. 7:46 AM May 17th via web
  5. @ChasidyMmhmm Already corrected. Go away. 2:25 PM May 11th via web in reply to ChasidyMmhmm
  6. If you drive a white Ford Crown Victoria and you're not a cop... Fuck you! I hope all the bad things in the world happen to you. 2:25 PM May 11th via web
  7. @emilyishere X___X DEAD! 6:53 PM May 5th via Twitter for iPhone in reply to emilyishere
  8. @emilyishere PS - Picture?! 6:11 PM May 5th via Twitter for iPhone in reply to emilyishere
  9. @emilyishere She always does. <3___<3 6:10 PM May 5th via Twitter for iPhone in reply to emilyishere
  10. @317Kim Just became my least favorite Pacers fan... 8:41 PM May 3rd via Twitter for iPhone in reply to 317Kim
  11. Apparently my sexual advances make my girlfriend just want to roll over and go to sleep. If you laugh at this I hate you! Seriously. 8:39 PM May 3rd via Twitter for iPhone
  12. @PatMcAfeeShow #Boomstick -- Not a penis joke. 2:53 PM May 3rd via web in reply to PatMcAfeeShow
  13. Ek voel ongewenste. 8:55 AM Apr 22nd via Twitter for iPhone
  14. When you're talking to someone and they seem extremely reluctant in their response? Yeah, that... 7:43 AM Apr 20th via Twitter for iPhone
  15. The stats speak for themselves, bro. twitter.com/DustinAbel/sta… 7:30 AM Apr 16th via Twitter for iPhone
  16. If sex offenders had to register their Twitter accounts, I'd look 'em up and tweet people's FourSquare locations to them. (Don't rape me...) 2:02 PM Apr 15th via web
  17. Donatos Delivery Man: "Who does your ink? Looks tight." Me: "Got 'em in prison, bro." Donatos Delivery Man: ".....have a nice day." 11:58 AM Apr 15th via web
  18. @PatMcAfeeShow My playoff tickets in the club level were about $1400. Get ready to fork over some cash if you really want those courtsides! 9:24 AM Apr 14th via web in reply to PatMcAfeeShow
  19. Bby I would in a heartbeat! RT @cjwallace03 "@DustinAbel take me on a date 2:18 PM Apr 11th via web in reply to cjwallace03
  • Name Dustin Abel
  • Location Indianapolis
  • Web http://jihadcowbo...
  • Bio Hi! What are you wearing? Pull your pants down! Nothing that I write on here is a joke. This is my life we're talking about.
269 Following 4,223 Followers 18 Listed