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DieLaughing

@abigvictory I am confused. Are you Paul Newman sans penis? Jesus loves you. Stop swearing so much.about 3 hours ago from Tweetie in reply to abigvictory
What do you guys think of 'Page Load Error' as a girls name?about 9 hours ago from web
Just informed the Castro Radioshack that nextdoor was on fire because I saw it on Twitter. They had no idea. I am Batman.about 12 hours ago from Tweetie
Moving from Oakland to San Francisco requires people for a fire bucket line, except everyone is trying to put it out with clothes and boxes.about 16 hours ago from web
Do you know what I love the most about not being able to answer rhetorical questions?about 20 hours ago from web
@lucindamichele I'm getting that on a t-shirt.about 20 hours ago from web in reply to lucindamichele
It's moving day. I expect to cross the Bay Bridge at least 6 times today. And stairs. Lots and lots of stairs. And stares. Boxes and pain.about 21 hours ago from web
My girlfriend ate a whole bag of cookies and now it sounds like she's tossing lemons in the toilet. I hope I remembered to remove my lemons.about 22 hours ago from web
@abigvictory 'Redact' is my safe word.about 22 hours ago from web in reply to abigvictory
@abigvictory I see it's time for my "will somebody give @abigvictory dick" tweet.about 23 hours ago from Tweetie in reply to abigvictory
@shockozulu Now when I meet you I can say "I loved you in that one thing called Twitter" instead of reciting all your films.12:59 AM Jul 9th from web in reply to shockozulu
This Fall on CBS: Touched By A Hippie --Craig Ferguson12:51 AM Jul 9th from web
@califmom Happy Birthday! It makes me glad that I'm sharing it and Ferguson with you!12:45 AM Jul 9th from web in reply to califmom
I <3 Craig Ferguson12:40 AM Jul 9th from web
I just watched Angels & Demons and the best part is still the explosion at the end when I yelled 'MacGruber!'12:04 AM Jul 9th from web
I c-c-c-could burn this whole place d-d-down.6:57 PM Jul 8th from web
@I_am_Ozma Rape jokes almost never work. I am not completely wrong, but instead, I don't think you understood what I was saying.6:45 PM Jul 8th from web
I just don't know how I am going to keep up with you guys without stopping and waiting.5:58 PM Jul 8th from Tweetie
I should start a website devoted entirely to horrible tragedies that have occurred throughout history on anyone's birth date.4:30 PM Jul 8th from web
I only use volunteer rape victims to demonstrate how to defend yourself against false accusations. They agree to disagree.4:27 PM Jul 8th from web

Name J. Adam Moore
Location Starfleet HQ, San Francisco
Web http://wordsoncal...
Bio Computer Scientist, Humorist, Author of The Losers Book Of Compromise. Txt: DieLaughing to 50500 for contact info.