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is still trying to get over Manny Pacquiao saying "clitoris" on live television. 1:50 AM Oct 5th from web
is totally adding "porksword" and "fartminge" to her vocabulary. 10:20 PM Sep 24th from web
fears that generic Korean dramas with horrendous english subtitles are corroding her mum's brains. 10:03 PM Jul 20th from web
is fighting the urge to drag her mother into the pool of Harry Potheads swimming in the Half Blood hysteria tonight. 8:49 PM Jul 15th from web
is waiting for The Almighty Bladder to stop pissing rain so she can get the f*ck home already. 5:20 AM May 7th from web
@kcatcutler One day our eyeballs will grow limbs and break-dance in our sockets. 7:50 PM Apr 27th from web in reply to kcatcutler
Mom is following me on twitter. Having an argument with myself on whether or not I should censor my tweets. Meh. Hi mom! 5:00 PM Apr 26th from web
global proc noMoreBirdRigs() { if(`birdRig -exists tessa_goBonkers`) murderTessaNOW pretty_please; } //Result: ./wtf, right? 5:34 AM Jan 15th from web