DavySunshine
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@ I sure could go for a Snickers® about now. Wait... what?
about 5 hours ago
via web
in reply to Slinkybrowneyes
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"Wow." - anonymous
about 6 hours ago
via web
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Each of us is responsible for her/his own actions -- and for our own murder, should we choose to smack our chewing gum.
about 8 hours ago
via web
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@ "Put that on the Internet, and people will repeat it for centuries.” - Albert Einstein
about 10 hours ago
via Twitter for iPhone
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@ "There is no end to the dumbassed stuff some humans will do." - Mother Teresa
about 14 hours ago
via Twitter for iPhone
in reply to SaraRosinsky
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@ oh, my... Yikes.
about 24 hours ago
via Twitter for iPhone
in reply to psefsu
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When I make you read the words "we all live in a yellow submarine" -- I also make you *think* a particular tune. That's pretty heavy, right?
about 24 hours ago
via Twitter for iPhone
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The primary difference between a margarita or three and a decapitation is the likelihood of headaches afterward.
about 24 hours ago
via Twitter for iPhone
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@ I would attribute that particular gift, should it arrive, to the ubiquitous benefactor: "destiny" ;-)
5:55 PM May 24th
via web
in reply to psefsu
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My neighbor gave me guacamole. I gave me a margarita or three. I love living in such a giving neighborhood.
5:45 PM May 24th
via web
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How do you tell a clever person from a Tottenham supporter? No, wait. That's too easy. I'll try to think of a better one...
3:44 AM May 24th
via web
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"If you run into an obstacle that forces you to question yourself today, sit down and have a good cry. Then give up." - Worst LifeCoach Ever
3:42 AM May 24th
via web
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Whenever Twitter suggests to one of my accounts that I should follow another one of my accounts, I end up getting snarky with myselves.
3:39 AM May 24th
via web
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My finger guns backfired and I just shot myself in the face with awesome.
12:43 PM Jun 23rd, 2011
via TweetDeck
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I reckon you could pair Caymus Cab with anything -- like, say, a peanut butter & jelly sammich -- and it would constitute "fine dining."
4:27 PM May 23rd
via Twitter for iPhone
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Wow. This guy's PowerPoint slide has 257 words on it. I just counted each of them, and now my head hurts. Seriously. 257 words. 1 slide.
12:40 PM May 23rd
via Twitter for iPhone
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You know that high-pitched shrieking noise babies make when they're utterly delighted? That's the sound effect in my head when I star tweets
4:15 AM May 23rd
via web
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@ very well played
4:56 PM May 22nd
via web
in reply to santhonythomas
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I can make my 8 month-old daughter laugh out loud without even touching her. Making you chuckle with 140 characters is gravy.
4:44 PM May 22nd
via web
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There is no crying in rap.
5:18 PM May 21st
via web
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