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DavePrague

  1. I love a good book but they just lack the stunning visual effects of movies 10:40 AM Mar 29th via web
  2. this year for St. Patrick's Day I will drink nothing but black and tans as both a celebration and fuck you to the Irish 9:21 AM Mar 17th via web
  3. I think marriage is like a roller coaster It has ups and downs and you spend your time screaming in a mixture of fear and excitment. 12:57 PM Jan 16th via txt
  4. I quit smoking by getting addicted to second hand smoke. All of the cancer and none of the cost. 8:20 AM Dec 23rd, 2011 via txt
  5. My alarm clock broke the other day and I had to decide if I wanted to get a cheap new one or splurge and get a rooster 7:27 AM Dec 2nd, 2011 via txt
  6. Sitting in the green room at the Hartford Funny Bone. It's beige and no one cares but I might never been in on again 4:07 PM Oct 20th, 2011 via txt
  7. know what's a good weight loss trick. Take an energy drink right before bed and fight it to sleep 5:15 PM Sep 26th, 2011 via txt
  8. I got a tattoo that said no regrets in retrospect it was a bad idea. 9:50 AM Sep 22nd, 2011 via txt
  9. I like how churches are closing because of the hurricane. They're basically saying God will not protect you. Stay home 4:50 PM Aug 27th, 2011 via txt
  10. Any time someone tells me it was adam and eve not adam and steve I say. Hey you weren't there you don't know 2:25 PM Jul 21st, 2011 via txt
  11. I went to the ice cream truck my roommate told me we had Klondike bars Mine cost a dollar they expect weird stuff for a klondike bar 6:29 PM Jul 3rd, 2011 via txt
  12. If life gives you lemons sell them at the local grocers market and turn a tidy profit 5:27 PM Jun 21st, 2011 via txt
  13. I wanna get one of those It's a boy ballons they have for babies and give them to cross dressing prostitues as a warning for others 5:44 PM May 28th, 2011 via txt
  14. You have no idea how awkward I felt when I found the phrase I'd hit that didn't refer to woman I wanna punch 9:17 AM May 27th, 2011 via txt
  15. I was leafing through a book my roommate was reading and he told me not to lose his page. I told him unless I tear out of the book he's safe 6:18 AM May 20th, 2011 via txt
  16. My brother cut his hair for charity he showed me the two tails told me he didn't know why she did 2. I think she just wanted him in pig ... 5:25 AM May 20th, 2011 via txt
  17. The other day someone asked if I could break a 20 dollar bill I said I dobut it there only made of paper. I can tear it though 5:17 AM May 20th, 2011 via txt
  18. I asked my gps fastest way to drive across the country it gave me directions to the airport 9:05 AM May 8th, 2011 via txt
  19. I went to a 3d movie I don't know if those glasses worked in the theater but they definatly work ourtside 4:34 PM May 7th, 2011 via txt
  20. The other day my phone rang and I didn't asnwer it cause I really just wanted to listen to my ringtone 11:17 AM May 6th, 2011 via txt
  • Name David Prague
  • Location South Windsor, CT
  • Bio I'm an up and coming comic just here to share some laughs with you all in 140 characters or less. C'mon one liners
86 Following 58 Followers 2 Listed
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