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Darren_Dutton

  1. Don we now our gay apparel. This bright red PVC bodysuit feels a bit tight though. 6:51 AM Dec 18th from dabr
  2. I tried to do some online shopping on the Woolworths website but it was all boarded up. 2:24 AM Dec 17th from dabr
  3. Today I put a Man in a tree, threw stones at him and then I got him down from the tree. I think I might write a story about it. 2:24 PM Dec 16th from TweetDeck
  4. Just seen Disney's Christmas Carol. Jim Carrey is old man Steptoe with the voice of Prince Philip. 5:14 AM Dec 16th from dabr
  5. Worst place to go for a drink this Christmas: Bar Humbug. 11:03 AM Dec 14th from dabr
  6. @serafinowicz your appearance on Wogan's show this morning was just lovely and very funny btw 10:06 AM Dec 14th from dabr in reply to serafinowicz
  7. @serafinowicz Ol' Tel's having a whitey.... 12:00 AM Dec 14th from dabr in reply to serafinowicz
  8. Badminton, eh. What a waste of time. 11:39 PM Dec 13th from dabr
  9. Leslie Ash regrets that fateful day she said "Go go Gadget Face". 8:07 AM Dec 11th from dabr
  10. One of the pleasures of twitter is discovering which celebrities have problems with basic literacy. 11:35 PM Dec 9th from dabr
  11. The Meteorological section of The Lancet today predicts cloudy urine. 11:12 PM Dec 5th from dabr
  12. Mmm, these spring rolls are delicious. Hang on- those aren't spring rolls, they're Kangaroo penises! Damn those Iceland/I'm a Celebrity ads 11:53 PM Nov 29th from dabr
  13. The Queen is being played by five different actresses on Channel 4 next week. I hope she regenerates at the end of every episode. 9:54 AM Nov 28th from dabr
  14. I didn't clean round the bath this morning therefore confirming my status as a baadass mofo. 10:24 AM Nov 26th from dabr
  15. It's the last episode of Eastenders tonight. New series starts on Thursday. 11:03 AM Nov 24th from dabr
  16. It all started off so innocently with those Spiderman candy cigarettes. Now I'm addicted to Batman crack cocaine. 4:00 AM Nov 22nd from dabr
  17. Toying with the idea of writing a sitcom set in a morgue which would have the same theme tune/lyrics as "Cheers". 1:48 AM Nov 21st from dabr
  18. So there's a birth certificate and a death certificate but as yet still no intermediate "how's it going?" certificate 11:34 PM Nov 18th from dabr
  19. Those Chinese Wispas are horrible. I think the recipe got mixed up when it was passed around all the different countries. 6:35 AM Nov 18th from dabr
  20. My Uncle died of dyslexia. He needed to go to A & E but ended up at B & Q. 9:59 AM Nov 15th from dabr