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DarrenWells

@Supattack Desert Bus is on the iPhone? SOLD. about 4 hours ago via Twitter for Mac in reply to Supattack
I want to buy a bus driving simulator and I don't know why. about 4 hours ago via Twitter for Mac
Facebook's iPhone app could not be more arse if it were crafted directly from Mark Zuckerberg's buttcheeks. 10:02 PM May 24th via Tweetbot for iOS
@Luceobrien Broaden it out to movies in general and you get Conspiracy Theory, Flatliners, Hook... 9:26 PM May 24th via Echofon in reply to Luceobrien
@josemalene @crunchytiger More like taking your fatty offspring to the liposuction clinic every time he gets too large for your liking... 8:39 PM May 24th via Echofon in reply to josemalene
@spandaslui Sounds like it failed to "rise" to the occasion. #badoomtish 8:32 PM May 24th via Echofon in reply to spandaslui
@josemalene So, essentially, I'm like a bad parent, Buffalo Bill, and the witch from Hansel and Gretel all rolled into one. 8:28 PM May 24th via Echofon in reply to josemalene
I have sourdough starter. It looks ugly, I keep it in the fridge, and I feed it every three days. I feel like an abusive parent. 8:13 PM May 24th via Echofon
@atablefortwo What a dick. 6:49 PM May 24th via Echofon in reply to atablefortwo
If you only say happy birthday to @AmandaOeiWells once this year, say it today. Because today is her birthday. So it kind of makes sense. 3:18 PM May 24th via Tweetbot for iOS
@eliotfish Purple monkey dishwasher. 2:44 AM May 24th via Tweetbot for iOS in reply to eliotfish
@matthewsteen Bazaar Beer Cafe in St Leonards. It defeated me. I limped away with the leftovers in a doggie bag. 3:30 AM May 23rd via Twitter for Mac in reply to matthewsteen
I used to be hungry like you. Then I took a pork knuckle to the stomach. twitter.com/DarrenWells/st… 2:28 AM May 23rd via Photos on iOS
@michaelmeloni @Serrels In Hong Kong, you don't even need to see "The Crying Game" - it's called "Oh No! My Girlfriend Has a Penis!" 11:38 PM May 22nd via Echofon in reply to michaelmeloni
@Gameboffin "I was in a computer game. Funny as Hell, it was the most horrible thing I could think of." 10:44 PM May 22nd via Echofon in reply to Gameboffin
Kickstarter! RT @barrymcbruce: @DarrenWells If you killed the monkey in lvl 2 of NOLF you failed the mission due to "Needless Simian Death" 8:43 PM May 22nd via Echofon
Kickstarter. No One Lives Forever. Kickstarter. No One Lives Forever. Kickstarter. No One Lives Forever. Make it happen. 7:34 PM May 22nd via Echofon
@crunchytiger @AmandaOeiWells @josemalene I'm on deadline. But if I emerge at a reasonable hour, I'm definitely up for trying some octodog. 11:50 PM May 21st via Echofon in reply to crunchytiger
@crunchytiger Oh my... bless you, Internet. 7:35 PM May 21st via Echofon in reply to crunchytiger
"I like tortoises. I'm not bagging them out or anything. But they're not cats." -@shaun_prescott 7:30 PM May 21st via Echofon

Name Darren Wells
Location Sydney, Australia
Bio Editor, Official Xbox Magazine Australia. Games writer, industry commenter, lover of gadgets and gizmos. (Tweets here are my own and don't reflect any company.)