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crackbarbie

  1. Somebody just messaged me that they are "bumbed out." lawl.about 5 hours ago from UberTwitter
  2. You guys all need to follow @1creepy_pervert. He is my fav.about 6 hours ago from UberTwitter in reply to 1creepy_pervert
  3. Following back @beccaomgz in hopes of seeing a snatch. Snatch is German for palm, right?about 6 hours ago from UberTwitter
  4. I'm getting used to this super sad face in the mirror.about 6 hours ago from UberTwitter
  5. @jarvitron Bye Buddy, hope you find your dad...about 7 hours ago from UberTwitter in reply to jarvitron
  6. No matter how many times I've read it, and I still know what's coming, the book I'll Love You Forever never fails to make me cry.about 7 hours ago from UberTwitter
  7. I often wonder how black men can date white women. Black men seem so laid back and white women, well, white women are fucking crazy.about 9 hours ago from UberTwitter
  8. Representing Avenue of Embers.about 11 hours ago from UberTwitter
  9. @EvertB Scabby and itchy and drunk.about 12 hours ago from UberTwitter in reply to EvertB
  10. Since I'm pretending irl that that skateboard didn't just hurt my shin, I will let all of you know that indeed, it did. Also, MOTHERFUCKERabout 12 hours ago from UberTwitter
  11. WHY WONT TWITTER LET ME BLOCK @MiaChambers I DONT CARE WHAT YOURE LISTENING TO.about 12 hours ago from UberTwitter in reply to MiaChambers
  12. Oh, how I've missed full alcohol beer.about 13 hours ago from UberTwitter
  13. I get drunk and I just want to have @Remiel's babies.about 13 hours ago from UberTwitter in reply to Remiel
  14. Son saw that I had boob sweat in my bikini. He said "Hang on. I have idea." So he gets up and blows on my back.about 13 hours ago from UberTwitter
  15. Drnkenly eating Pringles out of a flip flop.about 13 hours ago from UberTwitter
  16. By the way he just stuck the hose down his pants, I'm going to have to guess the latter.about 14 hours ago from UberTwitter
  17. Watching my son put his mouth over the hose while it's on. He's either going to be a great keg stander like his mama, or, oh, nevermind...about 14 hours ago from UberTwitter
  18. My son is now at the ripe age where he can go and get mama a beer out of the fridge and scream and tell her she's a raging drunk.about 14 hours ago from UberTwitter
  19. @adrianadeleo Loooooooool. Best movie evar!about 14 hours ago from UberTwitter in reply to adrianadeleo
  20. Son just told me someone was at the door. I went to answer it. It was the neighbors dog. Selling magazine subscriptions. Bitch.about 15 hours ago from UberTwitter
  • Name crackbarbie
  • Location I like shrimp cocktail?
  • Web http://favrd.text...
  • Bio I'm full of random, creep and good dental hygiene. I celebrate good grammar. I'm not a nice girl. I will probably offend you.
382 Following 1,522 Followers
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