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ChadRiden

  1. My life insurance premium is always due on my birthday, like I'm being taxed for living another year.
  2. What a f'in day. I'd write more, but I've gotta research a few statutes of limitations first.
  3. On my way to Augusta, GA where the Funny will flow like wine! ..or at least like the cheap swill I'll be drinking.
  4. If I ever write an autobiography about this stage of my career.. it might be titled, "fun show! Now I'm waiting to get paid."
  5. Bringing my special blend of jackassery, slander and stupid to Ft. Walton Beach,FL tonight.
  6. what pirates?
  7. @yaulp be careful, I think she might be a "leave no witnesses" kinda girl.
  8. RT @yaulp I've been giving her pointers. I told her the pond out back was a good place to stash the body. Snapping turtles clean up ftw!
  9. @kerrikerri I substituted whoopins for wishes. We watched UFC 100 and then I showed her what a REAL whoopin' looks like. WHOOP WHOOP WHOOP!
  10. RT @kerrikerri @ChadRiden did she get her wishes?
  11. So, if this is the last you hear from me, Callia finally figured out a way to take me out.
  12. She caught me snickering and said, "I can do serious damage, you know. If I get motivated, I can really hurt you."
  13. My 6-year-old just wished for "a hot spring next to the house, pretty wings so I can fly, and a star in a jar with mittens so I can hold it"
  14. I was in elementary school when MJ's Thriller came out. I wore my left hand little league batting glove all day every day for months.
  15. The Jackson family has been "leaving Forest Lawn Cemetery" for frickin' ever. Come on! Get your asses in the cars and let's go.
  16. eagerly awaiting The Michael Jackson Memorial / Joe Jackson Comeback Show. I hope everybody is tasteful as they exploit MJ one more time.
  17. Apparently, over the weekend the Palin family allegedly gang raped Michael Jackson's corpse? can anyone confirm this?
  18. I've been off the grid for a while. Anything going on in the news lately?
  19. Just solved all of the world's problems. You're welcome.
  20. Atop Mt. Winnie watching 'splosions from three different cities with various Ridens.