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CaytonHolland

  1. If I'm at a party where everyone is on coke I just speak as slowly as possible and watch synapses fuse. about 12 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone
  2. @nixbros! “@denverdiatribe: New podcast is up: bit.ly/KzcDuq NixBros, LaughTrack, and #DenverDares Edition” about 12 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone
  3. House Speaker John Boehner just joined Spotify. about 15 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone
  4. Also, please #FF @weismanjake for the funniest, daily manic episodes on the Internet. about 16 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone
  5. #FF @missmayn @marknorm @TheNardvark @charpiecomedy @heymonroe @joshgondelman @donni @andyjuett @AmberTozer. Muhfuckers always deliver. about 16 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone
  6. @GrawlixComedy show is tonight! Doors around 10 pm, $10, Bug Theater featuring @welchbelch and @chrisfairbanks! First 75 in get free poster! about 17 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone
  7. Buy a shit-ton of skiing and camping equipment and then just leave it in the front hall closet for 18 years #DenverDares 7:24 PM May 24th via Twitter for iPhone
  8. I was going to take a vacation in Las Vegas but then I remembered I'm not trash. 1:17 PM May 24th via Twitter for iPhone
  9. We all sit here pretending we're not just passing time until the world gives us another Sugar Ray. 9:29 AM May 24th via web
  10. Even the best laid plans want you to take them to brunch the next morning. 8:44 AM May 24th via Twitter for iPhone
  11. I practice attachment parenting in that I attached a note asking the firemen to take care of my baby when I dropped it off at the station. 1:43 PM May 23rd via Twitter for iPhone
  12. If you ask me the only way to properly honor Christ is to make your bicep really huge then tattoo His face on it. 10:29 AM May 23rd via Twitter for iPhone
  13. My two favorite things are Seurat's 'Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte' and the new movie 'Battleship' 9:30 AM May 23rd via Twitter for iPhone
  14. Turns out people aren't addicted to their smart phones; we've all just been surreptitiously checking our reflection in our screens. 8:36 AM May 23rd via Twitter for iPhone
  15. On this day in neighborhood gentrification history I saw a homeless man pee on a recently-tagged tree and a permit for a vegan pie shop. 4:25 PM May 22nd via Twitter for iPhone
  16. Fan of the @Rockies? You should read this blog? Not a fan? Probably shouldn't read this blog. Check her out @TroyRenck adamisfreakingoutrightnow.com/2012/05/22/eno… 1:04 PM May 22nd via web
  17. When is Coldplay going to come to their senses and have @toddbarry open for them? #coldplaylive 11:43 AM May 22nd via web in reply to toddbarry
  18. It's always fun to watch people in Los Angeles pretend to kind of care about sports for a little bit 8:43 AM May 22nd via Twitter for iPhone
  19. Men In Black 3 is actually just 96 minutes of Will Smith talking to Tommy Lee Jones about Scientology. 6:12 PM May 21st via Twitter for iPhone