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CK_Lunchbox

  1. I'm a lucky man. I never would've gotten packed & ready for this trip without my wife. She's awesome for putting up with me. I love her.
  2. Sugar Milk is coming. Join the Facebook group - Thanks: http://tinyurl.com/lk8p3k
  3. 5 y/o just hurled a magic marker at her sister during a fight. Apparently she misunderstood the word "Sharpie."
  4. Just found out I have $40 library fine. I think I'm the victim of identity theft by domestic terrorists age 5 and 7.
  5. Apparently red ants really dig tortilla chips Found hundreds of them in the bag waiting for me to bring their order of fajitas & more salsa
  6. Tips for dad to bond with baby - http://shar.es/cDaN
  7. The 1st rule of (Kid) Fight Club You do not talk about Fight Club, 2nd Rule of (Kid) Fight Club Please don't tell on me for spitting on you!
  8. I've sent my resume & filled job apps out so many times, I don't know who I am anymore. I find myself asking, "When the hell did I do that?"
  9. For all you writers - which type of writer are you? RT @tweetmeme Collective Inkwell http://bit.ly/1cVEdA
  10. 11 loads of laundry DONE! WhooHoo! I'm da man! ...sort a *sigh* I think I'm going to go smoke a cigar & scratch my butt or something
  11. Elvis Presley & Michael Jackson ink deal with National Enquirer to keep ailing mag afloat: Grilled Cheese Jesus "burnt" after being snubbed
  12. What to say in Houston if you want to get punched in the face: "Hot enough for ya?" This has been a public service announcement.
  13. The kids living above us sound like 300lb kangaroos on pogo sticks in a sack race.
  14. "Dad, talking to you on the phone 50 times is like seeing your face for 1 second" I hate living away from my boys. Gotta find a way back
  15. It's so hot Houston & I forgot the kids' crayons in the van Do you know what 600 melted crayons looks like? A Crayola acid trip.
  16. 5 y/o's quote of the morning: SNEEZE! Hey, mucus almost came out of mouth, but my lips stopped it. (& we are all better for it)
  17. I can now refer to myself as an award-winning writer & it not be something I did in the second grade. http://tinyurl.com/ldfgqb
  18. Now they're saying Jeff Goldblum died on set in New Zealand today as well.
  19. Rough day - Michael Jackson, Ed McMahon & Farrah Fawcett all gone in the past 48 hrs. Condolences.
  20. Wife: Hey Hon what do you want for dinner? Me: I'm not that hungry. Wife: Good, just verifying because I didn't planning on cooking.