BriefNBitter
-
How do I prepare for a 7 hr drive w/ 2 dogs, 1 overworked spouse & a squeaky windshield wiper during the rainy season? Rum. Happy Holidays.
about 13 hours ago
from web
-
RT @: Oregon is filled with pale, pleasant, bloated, fleece-clad, sexless, half-smilers. My people!
about 17 hours ago
from web
-
Even better? Poo throwing Monkey evades capture. Go Monkey!
3:32 PM Nov 23rd
from web
-
Loving the Northwest: Drunken Seattle "Ninja" Impales Self On Fence.
3:28 PM Nov 23rd
from web
-
Tried to explain to Mom that just because she "bundled" doesn't mean she has wireless Internet all of a sudden.
9:59 AM Nov 22nd
from web
-
RT @: I liked the part in "New Moon" when Robert Pattinson discovers he has a vagina.
11:03 AM Nov 21st
from web
-
What's worse than having to tour with Miley Cyrus? Dying because you toured with Miley Cyrus.
1:55 PM Nov 20th
from web
-
RT @: Heroin Addicts Pressure President To Stay Course In Afghanistan
6:29 PM Nov 19th
from web
-
Man spotted wearing Snuggie & eating corn dog while walking across the Hawthorne Bridge. Go PDX. Thanks for the tip @
6:25 PM Nov 19th
from web
-
Paris Hilton dating someone who hates her as much as the rest of us do.
9:22 AM Nov 18th
from web
-
Pig out or check out? God, I'm torn...RT@Joan_Rivers The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention has a Best Comfort Food contest.
8:28 PM Nov 16th
from web
-
RT @ Cookie Monster: Me don’t know about these tweets. Me no can eat dem, so me don’t understand what all da hub-bub is about!
8:24 PM Nov 16th
from web
-
RT @ "Well played Palin. As the saying goes: Revenge is a dish best served by a ghost writer 14 months later." -Wanda Sykes
7:23 AM Nov 16th
from web
-
Anybody wanna get high, marry a same-sex partner & honeymoon in Cuba?
11:39 AM Nov 14th
from web
-
I wish RT @ Writing is like prostitution. First you do it for love and then for a few close friends and then for money.~Moliere
11:30 AM Nov 14th
from web
-
To combat Oprah & the ravenous face eating Chimp, I am blaring Aaron Neville's version of "Let it Be." Thanks, Aaron.
8:57 PM Nov 11th
from web
-
All I hear from the other room is, "Oh God. Oh God." Thanks, Oprah. Nothing like getting your face eaten by a Chimp. Ruin my Wednesday.
8:55 PM Nov 11th
from web
-
My partner is watching a DVR'd episode of Oprah - about the woman who had her face eaten by a Chimp. I am hiding. Hence the tweet.
8:50 PM Nov 11th
from web
-
Vatican announces belief in Aliens. In other news, Aliens still unconvinced in existence of Vatican.
11:31 AM Nov 11th
from web
-
Carrie Prejean believes marriage s/b between a man & woman but sex can be between a girl & her video camera:
1:28 PM Nov 10th
from web
|
- Name Jasmine Paul
- Location Portland, OR
- Web http://notguiltyb...
- Bio Jasmine Paul is the author of A Girl, In Parts & generally rather bitter.
|
