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Bluestalking

  1. Don't you look at me like that!
  2. Dear Life: You really suck sometimes, you know that? I'm mad at you.
  3. Patron just yelled across library at me, "Hey, librarian!" Took all my restraint not to respond, "Hey, loser!"
  4. Or am I?
  5. Not really. I'm lying.
  6. Ever gone to a book discussion when you haven't read the book? That's me today, and I am ashamed.
  7. Day started with dogs having explosive diarrhea. Then spilled coffee all over my lunch. Things not boding well today.
  8. My kingdom for nail polish remover.
  9. On the fifth day, God combined peanut butter and chocolate. And I see that it is good. Unfortunately, so do my hips.
  10. And, by the way, BRING ME CHOCOLATE AND NO ONE GETS HURT!
  11. If I turn up dead, it's because grad school killed me.
  12. Busy evening ahead, most of it involving therapy and therapeutic endeavors. Surprises me, too.
  13. Earthquake Center called afterward to confirm all here were well. I said, "It was just the cola." They replied, "4.5."
  14. Belching contest last evening, following dinner. Youngest son won. How does someone so small produce such loud noises?
  15. Husband away, sloth reigns. All hail immaturity.
  16. Surviving virus. Head near splitting open, spilling brain on my desk. Need quicker picker upper.
  17. 20 something blogs suck. They're all I'm perky and nothing on me jiggles. And my life is ahead of me, loser. So go suck it.
  18. Wonder why my ass gets stuck in doorways.
  19. Let sons choose dinner today. Had baked mozzarella sticks, tater tots, fried shrimp, corn & chicken noodle soup. Good eats.
  20. Forgot to wear my parka to work today. Am frozen solid. Surprisingly, I can still type. That's dedication.