Ames912
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I keep kicking over the space heater under my desk. Subconsciously I might be trying to burn the place down.
10:08 AM Dec 14th
from web
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New alternative to LOL: "LOTI" - Laughing On The Inside.
8:49 AM Dec 11th
from web
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People misuse LOL. I have new abbreviations to accurately depict internet emotions, like "MA" for "mildly amused."
7:56 AM Dec 10th
from web
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I'd be willing to bet that Tiger Woods is praying for a celebrity death right about now.
11:11 AM Dec 8th
from web
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Broke out the puffy coat. Found some goodies in the pocket, too - 2 pennies, half a tube of chapstick and a lot of lint.
8:50 AM Dec 8th
from web
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Tiger Woods may have slept w/the porn star from "OMG Tickle Me." Woods has signed on to star in the new movie "WTF Was I Thinking?"
6:52 AM Dec 8th
from web
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The song "8 Days of Christmas" by Destiny's Child was recorded in 2001, ergo they either predicted or caused the recession.
5:29 PM Dec 6th
from web
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@ at LGA they took away my nail file, but the pewter dagger-shaped letter opener was A-OK to carry on.
12:21 PM Dec 3rd
from web
in reply to skydiver
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Have you even fallen asleep on the toilet? In the middle of the day? While you have company over?
8:36 AM Dec 3rd
from web
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When on a job interview, if they ask if you are "accountable" it means if something goes wrong, they are going to blame you.
8:47 AM Dec 2nd
from web
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In honor of World AIDS Day I will have protected sex with as many people as possible today.
7:46 AM Dec 1st
from web
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A co-worker said F*** yay! & was afraid she caught me off guard. I replied, you could poop on my desk & it wouldn't catch me off guard.
12:07 PM Nov 30th
from web
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Win a new Macbook Pro on Cyber Monday 2009. Details here:
9:11 AM Nov 27th
from mobile web
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God making turkeys taste delicious. And brake pads... I am also thankful for brake pads.
6:40 AM Nov 26th
from web
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Last night I got hit on by a homeless guy - good to know that I still got it!
8:51 AM Nov 25th
from web
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The Jeopardy Teen Tournament makes me feel really really smart and really really stupid at the same time.
10:25 AM Nov 24th
from web
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When you say, "I can be accountable." What you mean is, "I don't mind being the scapegoat."
7:08 AM Nov 19th
from web
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When you say, "I am good at multitasking." What you mean is, "I have severe ADHD."
12:40 PM Nov 18th
from web
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When you say "I'm efficient." What you really mean is "I'm lazy."
8:27 AM Nov 18th
from web
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The bathroom at work smells like a nursing home-flowers, bleach & death. Its so overpowering, I might start driving home to pee.
9:12 AM Nov 17th
from web
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- Name Amy Ruud
- Location Detroit Rock City
- Web http://ruudremark...
- Bio I like to laugh at myself. I invite you to laugh at me, too.
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