AlexAdaire
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Ughhh females.
about 19 hours ago
via txt
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Don't mind me, just waiting for you to go to bed so I don't have to watch Fox news anymore.
10:42 PM May 21st
via web
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Apparently I have the right to remain silent but that won't stop me from tweeting THIS COP IS AN ASSHOLE!!!
7:28 PM May 21st
via Tweetbot for iOS
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If I had to live through nine lives, I'd be an asshole too.
9:57 PM May 21st
via Tweetbot for iOS
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@ oh woops yes.
11:53 PM May 19th
via txt
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@ I did! D:
11:35 PM May 19th
via web
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11:22 PM May 19th
via web
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I had a dream that I was at work, and when I realized I was dreaming I smacked a lady in the face with a rod just because I could.
11:22 PM May 19th
via web
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I'm made of novacaine.
11:21 PM May 19th
via web
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I asked why the ice cube I dropped went under the fridge and he told me to fuck off.
11:18 PM May 19th
via web
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@ Woops, I meant the next day off. I work until three tomorrow... Okay, shhh. *shoots self*
11:17 PM May 19th
via web
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@ Also, I have tomorrow off. May I come bother you and collect my many items?
11:17 PM May 19th
via web
in reply to thelittlerager
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@ NO WAY.
11:16 PM May 19th
via web
in reply to thelittlerager
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WE SUMMONED SATAN TONIGHT.
11:11 PM May 19th
via web
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Oh hey twitter, hi, hello, howdy.
11:10 PM May 19th
via web
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BIG HITLER. BIG OLE HITLER. BIG FAT HITLER WALKING AROUND TOWN SMILING CAUSE HE'S GOT LOTS OF FRIENDS AND SHIT. BIG HONKING HITLER.
6:26 PM May 19th
via web
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SINGING CHRISTMAS CAROLS IN SPANISH WHILST COOKING BACON OVER AN OPEN FLAME AT 9PM IN MAY
8:43 PM May 19th
via Twitter for iPhone
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@ Hey, but I said that!
11:08 PM May 19th
via web
in reply to pattermoon
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The fear of death is the most unjustified of all fears, for there's no risk of accident for someone who's dead.
10:32 PM May 19th
via Einstein
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@ is fighting my dog
9:19 PM May 19th
via Twitter for iPhone
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