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ASIO

  1. investigations show that Citizen @m1k3y is a techno-hipster in denial.
  2. apologizes for any interruptions (read: excessive censorship) to Twitter client services whilst rolling out new WolframAlpha ECHELON engine.
  3. SECURITY ALERT: Condition cat on a hot tin roof declared as weather machine testing results in somewhat undesirable results.
  4. investigations show that Free Slurpee Day is in no way related to yet another Government conspiracy to fill your bodies with evil nanytes.
  5. hopes that Citizen @GlenDouglas and the afore-linked nameless man can become best friends. What with their shared love of ugly hats.
  6. In effort of sharing info more relevant to Citizen @GlenDouglas, here is a picture of someone wearing an ugly hat. http://bit.ly/3jivMu
  7. recommends following the Citizen Neala (the brain behind @HeraldSunHit) offering reviews, competitions and audio/visual awesomeness.
  8. brings you the following public service announcement: 'Always blow on the pie.' http://bit.ly/21RuX9
  9. just lost The Game. If you're reading this - so did you Citizen.
  10. Là où est le de fromage Citoyen @Ninjamoeba?
  11. believes there is always the looming possibility of a zombie outbreak. (@ancyru)
  12. records indicate that @stilgherrian is always acting suspiciously. It is when he stops doing so that one needs to be worried.
  13. wishes to clarify that 'Event' agents are rather similar to 'Normal' agents. Only with a slightly poorer spelling competency. @ninjamoeba
  14. assures @Aussie_Kozy that the ACMA members responsible for that decision suffered a fate unable to be repeated due to language restrictions.
  15. is infiltrating @EBGamesAus in order to obtain advance copies of Left For Dead 2. Event Agents like to game.
  16. believes although alternates such as 'wombat alert' could be used, the expected backlash from RSPCA groups is simply not worth it (@lyndons)
  17. believes patterned alerts such as Herringbone may be an adequate replacement, pending evaluation from our interior designer. (@Ninjamoeba)
  18. has decided security alerts shall no longer be color coded in effort to avoid discrimination against the colorblind. (1/2)
  19. Alternating between Billy Ocean and DMX whilst procrastinating against riding in the hot sun.
  20. SECURITY ALERT: Condition Powder Based Concealer declared as the formerly pox-ridden Citizen @Mpesce is released from quarantine.