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JustPlainZack

@eyedews where can I buy me some #eyedews in Chicago??? It's gonna be a busy weekend! about 22 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone
I just saw shop that sells photo books and shit. Called a photo boutique. But they spelled it "foto booteak." Can you tell I'm in the ghetto 5:06 PM May 22nd via Twitter for iPhone
My great-grandmother is giving me jokes about her that she thinks I should use in my stand-up. 3:50 PM May 22nd via Twitter for iPhone
JennyMcCarthy My comment on posing for Playboy: Why should only 20 yr olds be considered sexy? Let's here it for the MILFs. 10:51 AM May 22nd via Echofon Retweeted by JustPlainZack and 430 others
"Even when it's at the expense of others, it's important to laugh. Laugh loudly, laugh often, and more important, laugh at yourself." 12:16 PM May 22nd via web
BurstYourCocoon Your children need your presence more than your presents. ~Jesse Jackson 12:47 AM Mar 27th via web Retweeted by JustPlainZack
MensHumor G'night Everybody! May all your life's ups and downs be under your blanket! 9:39 PM May 21st via HootSuite Retweeted by JustPlainZack and 880 others
If someone says "Facebook" deleted you from their friends list, that's code for "I don't like you." 4:51 PM May 20th via web
theblondeview @JustPlainZack Oh yes, your new book comes out this July? #bookplug "When Life Hands You Lemons... Throw Them at People!" by Zack Peter 10:47 PM May 19th via UberSocial for Android in reply to JustPlainZack Retweeted by JustPlainZack
@theblondeview I must have blonde vision, because I definitely get the Blonde View! 10:41 PM May 19th via web in reply to theblondeview
@theblondeview you obviously haven't heard that the title of my new book is, When Life Hands You Lemons... Throw Them At People! #BookPlug 10:40 PM May 19th via web in reply to theblondeview
@theblondeview this is the beginning of a new Twitter friendship. 10:26 PM May 19th via web in reply to theblondeview
@theblondeview if supporting a $2 million dollar donation makes me a perv, then hand me my scarlet letter! I'll add it to my collection! 10:15 PM May 19th via web in reply to theblondeview
theblondeview @JustPlainZack You crack me the hell up! 10:06 PM May 19th via UberSocial for Android in reply to JustPlainZack Retweeted by JustPlainZack
@theblondeview I just threw a few. Apparently donating your $2 mil Playboy paycheck to autism is "wrong." And supporting makes me a "perv." 10:08 PM May 19th via web in reply to theblondeview
@theblondeview I just skip the "til proven otherwise!" 10:04 PM May 19th via web in reply to theblondeview
theblondeview @JustPlainZack You know, I do! I always say, "Everyone's an idiot until proven otherwise!".... 10:02 PM May 19th via UberSocial for Android in reply to JustPlainZack Retweeted by JustPlainZack
VanessaLoret @JustPlainZack hahaha I've bared witness to that on many occasion. 9:59 PM May 19th via TwitBird in reply to JustPlainZack Retweeted by JustPlainZack
@theblondeview and I didn't steal that. I made that shit up right now. That's what being an autism activist will do to ya! Ya feel me? 9:58 PM May 19th via web in reply to theblondeview
I think I'm allergic to stupid people. Every time a stupid person makes a comment, my tongue tends to swell up and I vomit sarcasm. 9:55 PM May 19th via web

Name Comedian Zack Peter
Location Los Angeles, CA
Web http://www.JustPl...
Bio 95% of the time my ideas are good... in a bad way. Author of 'When Life Hands You Lemons... Throw Them At People!' (On sale July 2012 http://bit.ly/HsXt5F)